when they seek out a form of limited contact

[caughtnreleased]

So... .first time around my ex and I were NC, I saw him a few times, two of which I think were accidental run-ins, but one time I think he was hanging around my neighbourhood trying to catch a glimpse of me... .or wanting to be in my neighborhood.  Of course, everytime he saw me, he would run like hell in the other direction so fast that I was never able to really catch up and actually confirm it was him. But rather, it's that sensation that this guy who just caught of glimpse of you is speed walking away from you that is more the confirmation that it was him more than anything else.  Now that we are NC, I think he's doing it again.  I know others have experienced this kind of thing.  It's just so weird for me.  I don't feel threatened, because I never felt threatened by him actually.  And the one thing about catching glimpses is that it's so weird, especially since he doesn't engage with me, like say "hey, how are you?"... .like a normal person would, that I start to question my judgement about him, because I don't think he's a bad or threatenning guy deep down, but since this is so weird I wonder if I was so totally off about this guy and he's now stalking me?  But I think I need to trust that this is not a form of aggression... .but that, while he wants to remain NC, he also needs to get a little piece of me.  Like an addict, that smokes a bit of weed, to help stave off the craving for bigger stuff... .I dunno... .anyone else have some insights into this and what to make of it? It's weird. I don't know what to think.  I happen to have unfriended and then blocked him on social media, so I wonder if this is some kind of reaction to that.

[Infern0]

After she had split me the first time and told me to never talk to her again she called my work a couple of times to ask about something that she really did not need to ask. She acted as though she was a stranger on the phone. It was odd and unnecessary behaviour. When she didn't get any sort of rise out of this she begun contacting me directly and basically begging me to talk to her. I caved in, wish I hadn't.

[caughtnreleased]

Hi thanks for the feedback.  What I just find so strange is how extreme everything is.  And weird. I mean why not be able to just say hi, and act normal?  I am a bit angry at him so I probably would not be able to RESIST making some kind of highly sarcastic and snide comment if I were to see him, or flat out call him a coward... .  so perhaps he's afraid? But really, isn't acting like an adult being able to be somewhat truthful with someone, and also being able to receive a certain amount of criticism?  Like, if he acts imperfect (boy did he ever), he needs to run away, because I've seen what a jerk he can actually be.   I know this time of year is hard on him for a number of reasons... .maybe that's why he's wanting to get a glimpse of me? it's weird. I don't know what to think about this.  And not sure if it will cause him to seek out more contact, or if that's really all he wanted and won't be in touch again.  Just weird. I wish this guy could grow out of it.  I know it's not simple, but it's retarded that he's so stuck.  He himself says he's got BPD, and that he's stuck in a cycle! and now I'm on cycle 2... .watching the same old crap happen as before.  It's the most incredibly stupid idiotic thing I've ever witnessed.  All I can do is keep going forward.

[misty_red]

Yeah, same here. Getting the silent treatment for four months now. Went NC, reached out via text in a decent way one last time to say goodbye (and I meant it!) but she showed up twice at sports events she knew I'd be (we were in the same sport's team). When she's there she's not talking to me at all and ignoring me (and making it obvious I notice), but she's there. Just popping up once a month.I don't know why.