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Author Topic: Is no news good news?  (Read 439 times)
FaithHopeLove
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« on: October 09, 2019, 07:18:43 AM »
Friends, I need a reality check. I am in Africa and my 24 year old BPD son is in the US. He has my phone number here and texted me before. I have not heard from him in 2 weeks. He is not answering my texts. I am assuming no news means good news. Usually when he is suicidal or arrested or in trouble he calls. Am I being realistic in this assumption?
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Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
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Relationship status: Married. With adult child relationship can be described as loving. Cloudy with sunny breaks. High wind warning. Risk of thunderstorms but much less severe than previous. Long term forecast shows promise of sunnier days ahead
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« Reply #1 on: October 09, 2019, 09:18:31 AM »
Hi Faith,  I can only tell you that I my experience no news has always been good news. Do you have someone in the US who is close by that could check on him to ease your concern?
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“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.”

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FaithHopeLove
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« Reply #2 on: October 09, 2019, 09:37:49 AM »
His sister lives nearby.
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FaithHopeLove
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« Reply #3 on: October 09, 2019, 10:09:25 AM »
It turns out no news is meh news
 DS called his dad this morning. Doesn't know or care when his next court date is, can't afford his rent but is not trying to downsize his apartment or make a budget, figures "things will be better in the next life" etc. Time to gently place responsibility back in his basket.
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Swimmy55
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« Reply #4 on: October 09, 2019, 10:21:14 AM »
Good for you , Faith! 
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nonbordermom11

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« Reply #5 on: October 09, 2019, 06:51:33 PM »
Faith...I'm pretty close to your situation,  DD is running low on money, I needed to pay her rent this month and some extras. A lot of pressure from her Aunts/Uncles to get moving on a job ASAP, no excuses, etc with a lot of encouragement that she can do this. I can see she has applied for multiple jobs so she is taking the initiative, hopefully it works, time will tell. I think rock bottom is maybe where they turn it around, they have to right? Stick to your guns, keep us posted. I'm also looking into gov help if she doesn't find a job, food stamps, etc. I can't have her coming home as well due to violent behavior and threats.
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wendydarling
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« Reply #6 on: October 10, 2019, 01:26:22 AM »
I'm glad you heard from him Faith, despite the same old narrative. What happens if he fails to turn up to court?
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FaithHopeLove
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« Reply #7 on: October 10, 2019, 02:03:49 AM »
If he fails to turn up in court he will be re-arrested and put back in jail, quite possibly for many years.
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