Devastated

[Oliveoilpancake]

I’m two weeks NC with bf of two years. He has severe anxiety and many traits of bod and npd, but I don’t which for sure. He has had a number of hospitalizations throughout his lis life for suicidal ideation and is treated for GAD. His other behaviors suggest a disordered personality.

I love him so much and I miss him so much. I’m so worried about him. I wish I hadn’t ended it but I didn’t know what else to do anymore. I’m pretty sure he is with someone else now, which is why he doesn’t care about us anymore.

I have some issues of my own...abandonment. Maybe a quiet borderline but never diagnosed. I know I pushed him away too many times. I just want him back.

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PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Mutt]

Hi Oliveoilpancake,



I’m glad that you decided to join us. I’m sorry don’t what you’re going through. Many people her can relate with wishing to get back together after the r/s had ended.

You said that you can push others away, often in these r/s dynamics there’s a push pull behavior from both sides. Had exhibited behaviors in the past where he pushed and then pulled?