We all develop, from time to time, thinking patterns that do not serve us well. One pattern is "triggering" -- having non-constructive reactions to specific words or actions based on prior experiences. We've all been there - resentment, pessimism, defensiveness, impatience, closed mindedness, distrusting, intolerance, confrontational, defeated...
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To achieve the state of wisemind we must first be present in the moment without judgment of self or others. This practice is known as mindfulness. There are several ways that mindfulness can help reduce the intensity, duration, and frequency of unhelpful habitual response patterns.
- Loosening the grip of habitual responses that cause (additional) suffering.
- Slowing the pace of thoughts/reactions.
- Reducing the intensity of unhelpful habitual responses.
- Increasing the spaciousness of present awareness.
- Noticing, enjoying and cultivating positive experiences and emotions
- Making connections that weren't there before.
WiseMind is a byproduct of self-awareness in which we learn to observe ourselves in real time and harmonize our emotions and logic so that our reactions can be more constructive for others and, at the same time, feel better ourselves. We don't want emotions to rule our lives or let ourselves become so detached that we are not living. An integration of logic/reason and emotions keeps us grounded in the present, slows down reactions, and provides the opportunity for meaningful communication.
How Do We Do This?
By paying attention to ourselves in real time. There are books written about this, but the short answer is to pay attention to yourself, observe yourself purposefully, in the present moment, and without immediately overlaying the old filters on the situation. By short circuiting the unhelpful, involuntary, conditioned responses of the past we make room for new and healthier communications and relationships.
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