Hi blondie34,
sounds like a major crisis for you
My BPDgf has tipped and gone over the edge.
She has been incredibly depressed over the past couple of months and I have done my best to support her, although I know I could have done better as I have made some critical mistakes. We have argued for the better part of the last few days (well almost every day for the last few months). This morning, I walked away and I am dreading going home as I do not know how this will escalate. I finally put my phone away from her texting non stop with how she views the world and me. I just told her I would be home later and we can discuss things more when she is calmer as my attempts at validation were not successful.
What did you say or do to validate her?
I have never seen her this way and I find she is progressively getting worse. When your partner constantly says they hate you and want to end the relationship. When do you finally listen and take them seriously?
Difficult to say. But she is talking to you and she is not closing down the relationship. The intensity of the struggle may indicate a strong attachment. Generally I would pay more attention to her behavior as what she says when dysregulated. Often your own emotions are a good indicator what is going on the other side as there will be a fair bit of transference. And you struggled to leave her.
