Truth or Manipulation--I can't tell anymore

[tayana]

My pwBPD has been in the hospital for a month now.  She told me yesterday that she is going to talk to the doctor about releasing her, even though she is still self-harming and still suicidal.  I took a stand and said that could come home from the hospital but not to spend her days alone and needed some sort of safety plan in place.  She called me all sorts of names, claimed I was kicking her out, keeping her from seeing the kids, etc.  She even told me the hospital was looking into domestic violence shelters because she was considered homeless. 

I really don't know how much of this to believe and how much is manipulation.  Her birthday is today and I called to wish her happy birthday.  She told me she is looking into hotels because her parents want her to go to a hotel instead of coming home.  I asked her why and she said it was because they were mad at me.  I explained to her yesterday, I'm OK with her coming home if she is in a better place and isn't going to continue the same cycle.  She informed me she wasn't coming home to give in to my demands.  I haven't made any demands only requested some sort of a safety plan.

She has already "Broken up" with me while she's in the hospital, but I don't know whether to believe that or if it's just another manipulation so I'll let her come back home.

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[Rockylove]

Tough call.  I don't know the situation or what she's done in the past, but it sounds like she's manipulating.  I don't understand why her parents would want her to go to a hotel if she's still at risk.  That would be a disaster!  Can you talk to them at all?

[tayana]

I spoke with her mom this morning and her frustration was with the hospital because they wanted her to go a group home in the past and she refused, now that she's agreed, they can't find one.  She didn't seem upset, but then I don't really know.  I think she is trying to make me drop the condition of the safety plan, but I don't know for sure.  She made sure to tell me what a horrible day she had been having when I spoke with her earlier to tell her Happy Birthday.  The doctor had told her just last week that she wasn't ready to leave, so I can't believe he'll let her go home when she just cut yesterday.