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Title: 30 day mark. Mixed emotions. Post by: toddinrochester on October 11, 2015, 08:31:49 AM I am struggling with it all.
Title: Re: 30 day mark. Mixed emotions. Post by: EaglesJuju on October 11, 2015, 09:19:03 AM I am struggling with it all. Hi toddinrochester, It is really tough to be struggling with the end of a relationship. What things are you struggling with the most? Title: Re: 30 day mark. Mixed emotions. Post by: toddinrochester on October 11, 2015, 09:37:39 AM It is how easily and quickly I was discarded. How fast they can just flip a switch. How it was everything I had waited five years for and it was taken away as fast as it happened. I am going to a movie with a friend and I am hoping that provides a decent distraction. It is hard to fathom how someone can say things and then walk. I will get through this. I have no one really to vent with but this board. Thanks.
Title: Re: 30 day mark. Mixed emotions. Post by: EaglesJuju on October 11, 2015, 10:22:06 AM It is how easily and quickly I was discarded. How fast they can just flip a switch. How it was everything I had waited five years for and it was taken away as fast as it happened. I am going to a movie with a friend and I am hoping that provides a decent distraction. It is hard to fathom how someone can say things and then walk. I will get through this. I have no one really to vent with but this board. Thanks. Unfortunately, the erratic emotions and impulsivity are a part of BPD. That does not negate the fact the behavior can be extremely hurtful. It is really hard to put logic and rationality behind ambivalence. It makes it harder for yourself if you are viewing this behavior as normative. It is not normative for someone to tell you that they love you and then cut you off abruptly. The avoidance and discard may be easy for someone who suffers from BPD in the short term, but typically causes more problems in the future. We are here for you. Keep posting. Title: Re: 30 day mark. Mixed emotions. Post by: DaKid on October 11, 2015, 10:30:03 AM This is exactly how I feel at the moment too. It's just hard to realize how after all they said they discard us so quickly.
I'm hurt. Sad. Confused. Shocked. Angry. Title: Re: 30 day mark. Mixed emotions. Post by: Palladio on October 11, 2015, 11:09:12 AM I agree totally that it is hard and for many of us it might be the most difficult thing we will ever have to endure. I'm speaking from 28 years of experience and 4 recycles. I have acknowledged his shame based behaviors and the scars from his ACOA past, but it is only from the last bu, two months ago, that I have become aware of BPD.
It is an illness they are suffering from and we then suffer from the ripple effect of their illness. How sad that we've gotten caught in their web and are the ones suffering the most while they seemingly aren't hurting even slightly, as they obliviously are creating more mayhem in another victim's world. The balm is that we will heal and they most likely will not. Sad but true. Title: Re: 30 day mark. Mixed emotions. Post by: toddinrochester on October 11, 2015, 02:16:38 PM Well I was doing pretty good. Now I have a tingling in my hands and feet and I almost fall over standing up so I will be distracted with this for a while. Goo me.
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