It is how easily and quickly I was discarded. How fast they can just flip a switch. How it was everything I had waited five years for and it was taken away as fast as it happened. I am going to a movie with a friend and I am hoping that provides a decent distraction. It is hard to fathom how someone can say things and then walk. I will get through this. I have no one really to vent with but this board. Thanks.
Unfortunately, the erratic emotions and impulsivity are a part of BPD. That does not negate the fact the behavior can be extremely hurtful.
It is really hard to put logic and rationality behind ambivalence. It makes it harder for yourself if you are viewing this behavior as normative. It is not normative for someone to tell you that they love you and then cut you off abruptly.
The avoidance and discard may be easy for someone who suffers from BPD in the short term, but typically causes more problems in the future.
We are here for you. Keep posting.