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Title: Legal Separation? Post by: toomanydogs on September 21, 2017, 08:52:35 AM Has anyone opted for a legal separation in lieu of a divorce?
TMD Title: Re: Legal Separation? Post by: SamwizeGamgee on September 21, 2017, 10:21:37 AM I have read of people doing a legal separation from a BPD. One experience sounded like they lived with it well enough - but I think the spouse was in another country, or at least well away from the other.
The idea I formed of the experience is that it was all the pain, with none of the eventual benefits. You're going through triggering the abandonment - and end up still entangled with your abuser. However, that's hearsay, so I'll watch to hear what others comment. Title: Re: Legal Separation? Post by: DaddyBear77 on September 21, 2017, 02:24:17 PM In a post a few years ago, our Site Director Skip posted the following general definitions:
Recycling is breaking up - ending it - then getting back together. Therapeutic separation is when we separate with the intent of reuniting. Trial separation (sometime called trial divorce) is when we separate with the intent of testing separate lives. I believe many members opt for some sort of separation before considering divorce. My wife and I chose a separation and after about 2 years we decided to resume our relationship. This would be considered a "recycle" and is also common among members. If you're interested in learning more about what a Theraputic Separation is about, click here (https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=141686.0) If you're considering a legal agreement, I might suggest you also consider posting a question to our Family Law, Divorce, and Custody (https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?board=10.0) board. Title: Re: Legal Separation? Post by: toomanydogs on September 21, 2017, 06:56:46 PM In a post a few years ago, our Site Director Skip posted the following general definitions: I believe many members opt for some sort of separation before considering divorce. My wife and I chose a separation and after about 2 years we decided to resume our relationship. This would be considered a "recycle" and is also common among members. If you're interested in learning more about what a Theraputic Separation is about, click here (https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=141686.0) If you're considering a legal agreement, I might suggest you also consider posting a question to our Family Law, Divorce, and Custody (https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?board=10.0) board. Yes, I'm considering a legal agreement; that's why I posted in Family Law. I saw a lawyer today, will see another tomorrow. Lawyer today told me I could still end up out of the house, and I want to stay here. All my animals are here. I'm in my 60s. I simply don't want to move, and the house belongs to H's trust. Title: Re: Legal Separation? Post by: WildernessMan on September 21, 2017, 07:25:33 PM My BPD wife, upon filing for divorce a month ago, wanted me to just move out and not divorce. The problem with that is she wanted me to continue paying all the bills I normally pay. However I simply don't make enough money to support two households and I have nobody to move in with.
I still live in our house. Title: Re: Legal Separation? Post by: toomanydogs on September 21, 2017, 08:07:40 PM My BPD wife, upon filing for divorce a month ago, wanted me to just move out and not divorce. The problem with that is she wanted me to continue paying all the bills I normally pay. However I simply don't make enough money to support two households and I have nobody to move in with. I'm sorry. You ever just start thinking, my spouse is an a**hole?I still live in our house. My H has been gone since mid-August. I don't even know where he is. TMD Title: Re: Legal Separation? Post by: WildernessMan on September 21, 2017, 08:38:25 PM Toomanydogs -
I'm there. Title: Re: Legal Separation? Post by: DaddyBear77 on September 21, 2017, 10:15:41 PM Yes, I'm considering a legal agreement; that's why I posted in Family Law. My mistake. I was confused as to which board I was replying on. Please disregard my last paragraph then. And I suppose most of the rest of my post doesn't help much either. My apologies. I saw a lawyer today, will see another tomorrow. Lawyer today told me I could still end up out of the house, and I want to stay here. All my animals are here. I'm in my 60s. I simply don't want to move, and the house belongs to H's trust. I would assume that a legal separation in your state would involve a separation of assets as well. It makes sense that you may end up in a similar situation with separation vs. divorce. Other than the house, what are your other reasons to consider legal separation vs divorce? |