Diagnosis + Treatment
The Big Picture
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde? [ Video ]
Five Dimensions of Human Personality
Think It's BPD but How Can I Know?
DSM Criteria for Personality Disorders
Treatment of BPD [ Video ]
Getting a Loved One Into Therapy
Top 50 Questions Members Ask
Home page
Forum
List of discussion groups
Making a first post
Find last post
Discussion group guidelines
Tips
Romantic relationship in or near breakup
Child (adult or adolescent) with BPD
Sibling or Parent with BPD
Boyfriend/Girlfriend with BPD
Partner or Spouse with BPD
Surviving a Failed Romantic Relationship
Tools
Wisemind
Ending conflict (3 minute lesson)
Listen with Empathy
Don't Be Invalidating
Setting boundaries
On-line CBT
Book reviews
Member workshops
About
Mission and Purpose
Website Policies
Membership Eligibility
Please Donate
May 06, 2025, 08:18:59 AM
Welcome,
Guest
. Please
login
or
register
.
1 Hour
5 Hours
1 Day
1 Week
Forever
Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins:
Kells76
,
Once Removed
,
Turkish
Senior Ambassadors:
EyesUp
,
SinisterComplex
Help!
Boards
Please Donate
Login to Post
New?--Click here to register
Experts share their discoveries
[video]
100
Caretaking - What is it all about?
Margalis Fjelstad, PhD
Blame - why we do it?
Brené Brown, PhD
Family dynamics matter.
Alan Fruzzetti, PhD
A perspective on BPD
Ivan Spielberg, PhD
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
> Topic:
Legal Separation?
Pages: [
1
]
Go Down
« previous
next »
Print
Author
Topic: Legal Separation? (Read 590 times)
toomanydogs
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Living Apart
Posts: 561
Legal Separation?
«
on:
September 21, 2017, 08:52:35 AM »
Has anyone opted for a legal separation in lieu of a divorce?
TMD
Logged
Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world... Einstein
SamwizeGamgee
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Separated
Posts: 904
Re: Legal Separation?
«
Reply #1 on:
September 21, 2017, 10:21:37 AM »
I have read of people doing a legal separation from a BPD. One experience sounded like they lived with it well enough - but I think the spouse was in another country, or at least well away from the other.
The idea I formed of the experience is that it was all the pain, with none of the eventual benefits. You're going through triggering the abandonment - and end up still entangled with your abuser.
However, that's hearsay, so I'll watch to hear what others comment.
Logged
Live like you mean it.
DaddyBear77
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Divorced
Posts: 625
Re: Legal Separation?
«
Reply #2 on:
September 21, 2017, 02:24:17 PM »
In a post a few years ago, our Site Director Skip posted the following general definitions:
Quote from: Skip on August 30, 2013, 01:13:50 PM
Recycling is breaking up - ending it - then getting back together.
Therapeutic separation is when we separate with the intent of reuniting.
Trial separation (sometime called trial divorce) is when we separate with the intent of testing separate lives.
I believe many members opt for some sort of separation before considering divorce. My wife and I chose a separation and after about 2 years we decided to resume our relationship. This would be considered a "recycle" and is also common among members.
If you're interested in learning more about what a
Theraputic Separation is about, click here
If you're considering a legal agreement, I might suggest you also consider posting a question to our
Family Law, Divorce, and Custody
board.
Logged
toomanydogs
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Living Apart
Posts: 561
Re: Legal Separation?
«
Reply #3 on:
September 21, 2017, 06:56:46 PM »
Quote from: DaddyBear77 on September 21, 2017, 02:24:17 PM
In a post a few years ago, our Site Director Skip posted the following general definitions:
I believe many members opt for some sort of separation before considering divorce. My wife and I chose a separation and after about 2 years we decided to resume our relationship. This would be considered a "recycle" and is also common among members.
If you're interested in learning more about what a
Theraputic Separation is about, click here
If you're considering a legal agreement, I might suggest you also consider posting a question to our
Family Law, Divorce, and Custody
board.
Yes, I'm considering a legal agreement; that's why I posted in Family Law. I saw a lawyer today, will see another tomorrow. Lawyer today told me I could still end up out of the house, and I want to stay here. All my animals are here. I'm in my 60s. I simply don't want to move, and the house belongs to H's trust.
Logged
Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world... Einstein
WildernessMan
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 76
Re: Legal Separation?
«
Reply #4 on:
September 21, 2017, 07:25:33 PM »
My BPD wife, upon filing for divorce a month ago, wanted me to just move out and not divorce. The problem with that is she wanted me to continue paying all the bills I normally pay. However I simply don't make enough money to support two households and I have nobody to move in with.
I still live in our house.
Logged
toomanydogs
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Living Apart
Posts: 561
Re: Legal Separation?
«
Reply #5 on:
September 21, 2017, 08:07:40 PM »
Quote from: WildernessMan on September 21, 2017, 07:25:33 PM
My BPD wife, upon filing for divorce a month ago, wanted me to just move out and not divorce. The problem with that is she wanted me to continue paying all the bills I normally pay. However I simply don't make enough money to support two households and I have nobody to move in with.
I still live in our house.
I'm sorry. You ever just start thinking, my spouse is an a**hole?
My H has been gone since mid-August.
I don't even know where he is.
TMD
Logged
Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world... Einstein
WildernessMan
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 76
Re: Legal Separation?
«
Reply #6 on:
September 21, 2017, 08:38:25 PM »
Toomanydogs -
I'm there.
Logged
DaddyBear77
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Divorced
Posts: 625
Re: Legal Separation?
«
Reply #7 on:
September 21, 2017, 10:15:41 PM »
Quote from: toomanydogs on September 21, 2017, 06:56:46 PM
Yes, I'm considering a legal agreement; that's why I posted in Family Law.
My mistake. I was confused as to which board I was replying on. Please disregard my last paragraph then. And I suppose most of the rest of my post doesn't help much either. My apologies.
Quote from: toomanydogs on September 21, 2017, 06:56:46 PM
I saw a lawyer today, will see another tomorrow. Lawyer today told me I could still end up out of the house, and I want to stay here. All my animals are here. I'm in my 60s. I simply don't want to move, and the house belongs to H's trust.
I would assume that a legal separation in your state would involve a separation of assets as well. It makes sense that you may end up in a similar situation with separation vs. divorce.
Other than the house, what are your other reasons to consider legal separation vs divorce?
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?
Pages: [
1
]
Go Up
Print
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
> Topic:
Legal Separation?
« previous
next »
Jump to:
Please select a destination:
-----------------------------
Help Desk
-----------------------------
===> Open board
-----------------------------
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
-----------------------------
=> Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
=> Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
=> Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
-----------------------------
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
-----------------------------
=> Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
=> Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD
-----------------------------
Community Built Knowledge Base
-----------------------------
=> Library: Psychology questions and answers
=> Library: Tools and skills workshops
=> Library: Book Club, previews and discussions
=> Library: Video, audio, and pdfs
=> Library: Content to critique for possible feature articles
=> Library: BPDFamily research surveys
Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife
Loading...