Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
May 26, 2017, 04:22:34 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Relationship Quality When One Partner is BPD Read here
Administrator: heartandwhole
Moderators: Meili, once removed
Member support team: gotbushels, Tattered Heart, Turkish, wendydarling, Woolspinner2000
  Directory Guidelines Glossary   Boards   Help Please Donate Login Register  
Video, Audio, and Research for Member Critique
99
Could it be BPD
BPDFamily.com Production
Listening to shame
Brené Brown, PhD
What is BPD?
Blasé Aguirre, MD
What BPD recovery looks like
Documentary
Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Alcohol and BPD  (Read 2859 times)
stilldazed

Offline Offline

Posts: 9


« on: March 05, 2011, 10:12:39 AM »

Without alcohol, BPD issues were relatively slight and we could live quite easily together.

Unfortunately, whatever goes on with the BPD psyche I don't truly know,  but I assume the rage/anger/annoyance triggers were just too great to keep him away from drinking for long.   The alcohol just escalated all the madness.   It brought a lot of other issues with it too that became insurmountable.

But I read on this site that someone said that without alcohol the BPD issues seemed more acute.   I just wonder what the range of experiences are with BPD and alcohol.
Logged
PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES
This is a high level discussion board for discussing effective actions for solving ongoing and day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems.
This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group by (clicking here).
breakingpoint
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 435



« Reply #1 on: March 05, 2011, 10:38:30 AM »

Good Morning Stilldazed...it has been my experience that when dealing with alcohol abuse and a suspected mental health issue...you need to eliminate the alcohol/drug first...so know exactly what you are dealing with. Many people who abuse substances have some sort of chemical imbalance and the booze/drugs is a way of self medicating...one thing can escalate the other (mental health issues can increase drug/alcohol consumption...drug/alcohol can magnify mental health behaviours). Have you tried attending Al-Anon meetings? You might find a lot of support there as well as here...a dual diagnosis can be difficult to deal with on your own.
Logged

Sometimes you're the windshield, sometimes you're the bug.
stilldazed

Offline Offline

Posts: 9


« Reply #2 on: March 05, 2011, 02:23:41 PM »

My relationship is ending.  Has ended?  I am in the process of detaching and trying to do the 'no contact' which is hurting a lot, but I'm trying.

He is killing himself with alcohol right now and there is nothing I can do.  I used to think if he managed to give it up we would be happy.  Now I realise that the alcohol is something he self-medicates to deal with his raging emotions. 

It's pretty hopeless.   I guess that is a breakthrough for me to finally realise I can't do anything about it.   Feels like a lifetime of trying to find him help but nothing ever works.  Like I said, it's hopeless.

Not sure why I still have so many questions but I still do.

Logged
Senra
**
Offline Offline

Posts: 219


« Reply #3 on: March 07, 2011, 12:05:42 AM »

Alcohol complicates things immensely...my uBPDbf def has a problem w alcohol and it makes the BPD symptoms worse (in his case it just depresses his mood which triggers dysregulation).  Unlike tools you can use to manage the BPD that actually make a dif, there's not much you can do to help manage a substance abuse issue in terms of stopping the abuse.  I feel a lot more hopeful about the BPD than I do abt the alcohol problem, LOL.  Although, I suspect that if his BPD continues to improve then his behavior around alcohol might also, to some degree...
Logged
2017 Financial Sponsors
Thank you. We are all appreciative of the thoughtful and responsible men and women who provide the support, education, and brotherhood to keep BPDFamily on the air and make a difference in the lives and families of many. To all, thank you for this wonderful resource.
12years
ackybreaky
Aiming4Kindness
akv
Aletheia
alf
allienoah
Anez
anothercasualty
antony_james
apocalypsenow
ArleighBurke
At_Bay
Aussieman
Avi
Axial
azbubba
babyducks
baconeggs
Barny1705
bearhunter
berry
bestintentions
bigredneck
bigsis
blackstone
Bob
bpdmom99
brahmin
braveSun
BritishDad
bunny4523
busybee1116
Calm Waters
Caroled
Cat Familiar
cdizzle
cherisw
chobers
Chosen
chump
cj488
cjames
Clearmind
cleotokos
Cmjo
Cole
Confused1234
confusedhubby
Conundrum
coworkerfriend
cricket
Crushedbyac
Curiously1
Darsha500
dealingwithit
DearBFF
Deb
doubleAries
DoxieLover
drained1996
DreamGirl
duncsvoice
Dutched
earlgrey
earlyL
Englishheart
Eye438
F150
Fian
Fie
FinallyItsTime
Finding Courage
Findingmysong723
flubber767
FlyFish
foggydew
foogarden
Foolishwizdom
ForeverDad
Fr4nz
Frank88
Free One
fromheeltoheal
Gables
Gagrl
Gema
gettingoverit
Gift to myself
gloveman
Gorges
gotbushels
half-life
HappyChappy
Harmless
HarposGal
Harri
havana
Healthy88
heartandmind
heartandwhole
Herodias
Homefree
HopefulDad
HopefulPapaOf2
img001
incadove
InIndia
inwardliberation
its_rosie
JaneStorm
Japeslee
jasmine-1234
jellibeans
Jellycat3
JerryRG
jo19854
joeramabeme
JohnSmith2016
JonnyKrunch
Joyinmotion
JulesC
junebug1929
KansasDad
kc sunshine
Keep
kentavr3
kiddfei
kim peter
Klera
knowingmyself
Kowalski
Kwamina
Kyanite
laker
Larmoyant
Leaf
Learning Fast
letgogirl
Lifewriter16
LilMe
little doggy
ost_in_translation
love4meNOTu
lovenature
lovestogarden
lucylou
luter
malibu4x
maple
Mars22
maryy16
mavis
maxen
Me-Time
meanlittleface
Meili
Memorial Donation
mggt
micWel
Mimmo
mitatsu
Mommyx3
Mother-in-law
MP2
mscj
Mutt
Naughty Nibbler
nevaeh
NewChick33
newlyhopeful
ninjacat
Nope
NorthernGirl
Oakridge
Octy
onelittleladybug
ortac77
ou81201370
P.F.Change
PaGuy
Panda39
patientandclear
PaulaJeanne
PDQuick
Pedros28
Penumbra66
Phoenix
PhoenixJade
Pilate
Pilpel
PinkieV
Pipedreamer25
pr0gressnotperfecti0n
Pretty Woman
Prim808
puppyA
Purged
Qcarolr
Quama
RAPIDclassic1
Rapt Reader
Raul
RDMercer55
Recycle
rfriesen
Ridingthewaves
Riguez
Roselee
RunningWithScissors
Ryno
rzr14
Sad4mydad
Sadly
samanthal
samuell
SamwizeGamgee
sanemom
schwing
SCM
Scrabble
seeperplexed
SES
sidra36
SilentObserver
Skip
Slipping
Sluggo
Someday . . .
Soniab72
Sophia77
StandingTall
steelwork
stellaris
stimpy
Stjarna
stockholmama
supermum
Survived
swampped
SweetCharlotte
sweetheart
T2H
takingandsending
Tattered Heart
tbddbt
TBirdy
Tea Fish
The Teacher
Theo41
TheraminFlick
thisagain
TigerEye
Tippy
TommyBahama
trappeddad
TruthLover
trytrytry
Turkish
ugghh
UndauntedDad
VitaminC
volumetwo
wag the dog
waverider
wchi
wellwellwell
wendydarling
WhatJustHappened?
Whichwayisup
whirlpoollife
whitebackatcha
WhoMe51
william3693
winston72
WitzEndWife
Woolspinner2000
worn_out
yaffle
yamada
Yaryar87
zaqsert


Pay it forward Here

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  



Study the thought patterns and inclinations of a BPD spouse, girlfriend, or boyfriend. Learn relationship building and learn communication skills and strategies for personal growth.

Welcome
READ BEFORE POSTING
Make your first post

Take the pledge
Tell us your story

Perspective Articles
The big picture
Is it BPD?
What does it take to make it?

What is the first step?
[Basic Tools]
Wisemind
Ending Conflict
Listen with Empathy
Don't be Invalidating
Setting Boundaries

Lessons

1 Understanding your partner’s behaviors.

2 Understanding your role in the relationship.

3 Tools: communication validation, and reinforcement of good behavior.

4 Surviving  confrontation and disrespect.

5 Finding inner strength and hope.

6 When everything else fails.


Workshops
Participate Here

Frequently asked questions
... about BPD.
... about using the board.


Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2017, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!