A quick thanks

[Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse...]

Hello, all,

I have been a member of this board for a distressingly long time now, and am embarrassed to post again about my continuing efforts at detaching from the predictably messy relationship with my dBPDbf.  It's makes me terribly sad and really impacts negatively on my sense of self to see that I keep allowing myself to get drawn back into this debacle again and again, and that every time I leave, my emotions and his promises draw me back.  No details needed, I just want to say that everyone on here is so tremendously important to keeping me afloat.  I do have a T, I do have some great friends, I do have a wonderful family... .but no one understands like you people do, and I find myself learning and reflecting on your shared stories and experiences every day.  I know that I WILL ultimately get the strength to leave once and for all, but in the meantime, I just wanted to express heartfelt thanks and gratitude for everyone on this board.  I'm sure there are more people than you can possibly know who gather much-needed inspiration and empathy from everything you share, and I'm certainly one of them. Thank you for sharing yourself and your stories.

[chillamom]

Hello, all,

I have been a member of this board for a distressingly long time now, and am embarrassed to post again about my continuing efforts at detaching from the predictably messy relationship with my dBPDbf.  It's makes me terribly sad and really impacts negatively on my sense of self to see that I keep allowing myself to get drawn back into this debacle again and again, and that every time I leave, my emotions and his promises draw me back.  No details needed, I just want to say that everyone on here is so tremendously important to keeping me afloat.  I do have a T, I do have some great friends, I do have a wonderful family... .but no one understands like you people do, and I find myself learning and reflecting on your shared stories and experiences every day.  I know that I WILL ultimately get the strength to leave once and for all, but in the meantime, I just wanted to express heartfelt thanks and gratitude for everyone on this board.  I'm sure there are more people than you can possibly know who gather much-needed inspiration and empathy from everything you share, and I'm certainly one of them. Thank you for sharing yourself and your stories.

[seenr]

Don't beat yourself up about going back. Many of us have been there. I know that if she asked me back right now, I'd get a surge of energy inside me. I wouldn't though without her accepting my boundaries.

I am glad you get help from this board, that is good.

[heartandwhole]

Hi chillamom,

I'm glad that you are still finding benefit from the wisdom on this site. That is wonderful. Detaching is really not easy, so it's very understandable to have setbacks along the way. We've all been there.

There is no perfect way to detach; we are all unique with our own set of weaknesses and strengths. I hope you will share your journey with us again sometime, if and when it feels right. We all learn from each other, so your sharing helps us, too.   

heartandwhole