It takes two people to argue but only one to end it . Like a game of tennis the argument needs two people for it to continue ...
There are things we can do to stop arguments. Communication techniques have helped me to stop and assuage many arguments with my bf. Before I learned communication techniques, I typically ended up arguing with my bf. My actions/behavior just added more fuel to the fire. Our communication has really come a long way. Here is an article to help get you started.
Communication tools (SET, PUVAS, DEARMAN)I dont know whether its just wishful thinking or if im being realistic but surely if we get the right help and support we have a chance of happiness together?
I understand how you could feel doubtful, but there is always a chance of happiness. Any relationship, including ones with non-disordered people, requires work. Fortunately, there are many ways we can start improving our relationships with our pwBPD. The tools that are available to us, not only work with our relationships with our pwBPD, but on other people in our lives. It truly is a win-win situation.
There is a greater probability for happiness if you both do get the right help and support. It is going to take some effort on her part to overcome many of her issues. As I mentioned before, the best thing that you can do is take the time to work on yourself. Improving our relationships with our pwBPD does require change on our part. From what I realized, taking the time to work on ourselves and change benefits both us and our pwBPD.
Just because she had BPD right now doesn't mean that its not something she can overcome? I refuse to believe we are a statistic . :)o the meds and therapy really help? I know shes not diagnosed yet but every trait fits .
There is not a cure for a personality disorder, but maladaptive behaviors can be "unlearned" and replaced with healthier behavior. Undoing years of learned behavior does take time and a lot of commitment. Therapy does help with this. Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is shown to be very effective with BPD patients.
Medicine does help with some of the symptoms such as, depression and anxiety.
Therapy/medication has helped my bf. He has made significant improvements while in therapy.