I Need Help

[Truth in Ruin]

My ex BPD gal has found another victim, her son is 12 years old, and is too scared to tell his mom that he misses me. I helped raise him for 3 years. She has made it clear that im not welcome at her place, but did not tell him not to talk to me anymore. He has his own cell phone. She wont answer my calls, or texts. Im sure she will be introducing a new boyfriend to her son soon(if she doesnt scare this guy away with being overly obsessed). Im unsure what to do! any help would be great! today is his birthday as well...  

[trouble11]

My 2 cents ... .  CALL HIM.  Well ... .  call him if you honestly believe you will stay in contact with him and there for him for the long haul.  The poor kid.  How many BFs has he been exposed to? 

[trevjim]

This is my experiance with a step son in a thread i wrote... .  

Quick background fill... .  I was with my expwBPD for 2.5 years, she had a 1 year old boy from a previous relationship (the birth day was in jail for abusing her and the boy) when we first started dating, i knew him from his first birthday to the day we split he was 3.5 years old.

myself and him bonded, i helped raise him, he called me daddy and i saw him as my son.

when we split we agreed i would still see the boy, the next day she started seeing an ex and said i am no longer able to see him and she wants the new boyfriend to be his dad.

So its been 3 months since we split and its obviously been hell moving on from my ex, but i feel i can do it, my problem is i dont know how to deal with the loss of my 'son'. Ive accepted he is no longer my responsibilty and there is nothing i can do about it ( i did try talking her round but i was split black so i got no where.)

everything reminds me of him, toys, parks, kids shows, all the things me and him used to do togeather. my nephew still asks where he is when he sees me.

its really heartbreaking.

All i can say is try and put procedures into place to make sure you still get to see him if thats what you wish

[Truth in Ruin]

Thanks trevjim. Trouble11 she Divorced his father at his age of 1. He was not introduced to a another man till age 9. Me. He is 12. Im sure she will introduce the new guy soon.

[Truth in Ruin]

He still sees his father every friday. I told her ex-husband she has a new boyfriend now. He was shooked, he did know we were apart for 2 months. I think his father wouldnt care either way if I saw his son or not. Im sure she would like it if I got lost all together. Im sure she is playing the victim. telling the new guy how bad of a person I am. So, in this case, Im sure the new guy wouldnt wont me around either.