My bf's current order only allows for supervised visitation at a facility. Once he completes parenting classes (which he did PRIOR to the order, but he's going to do it again just because it's written in the order) he's allowed an additional 3-4 hours of supervised visits OUTSIDE of the facility. The order also states that he gets his son's address & a phone number (so obviously BPDex's address and phone). It also states that he gets to attend 50% of his son's doctor's visits (which he currently can't do because the doctor is a negative advocate and won't allow my BF to attend visits).
It's a good idea to do what's in the court order (parenting class), even if the class is a repeat, and even if it makes no sense, in my experience.
Is there an explicit reason why BF needs the address and phone number? I'm not doubting that this is important, but sometimes courts look down on people who file motions for contempt that are (for lack of a better word) flimsy. Meaning, it might be in the order, but not complying with it doesn't create a negative impact for the child, so to speak.
If your BF needed the address & phone number to get his supervised visitation, then that would be consequential.
If your BF just wants the address & phone number because he wants it (and it makes sense to want it), I recommend he just contact the attorney.
You really don't want to be seen by the judge as someone who uses court to solve problems that can be fixed otherwise, even if those problems are created by a high-conflict co-parent. It's not fair
In terms of strategy, I was thinking that we would:
1. Ask for address & phone number a couple more times (we've only explicitly asked once); to which we assume she will respond with "contact my attorney," and
2. Ask for her to speak with the doctor and encourage him to allow my BF to attend doctor's visits; if he won't comply with that request then we were going to follow-up with a request to change the pediatrician to someone who doesn't know the history of the parental dysfunction (and is not a negative advocate) so that he gets what he's entitled to in the court order. My assumption for this is that she will either (1) refuse to speak with the doctor, and/or (2) state the the doctor doesn't want to and she will not change the pediatrician for son.
That's unfortunate about the caller ID incident -- it probably gave the doctor's office reason to believe any negative stories about your BF. Has your BF gone to the office to discuss what happened and why? And to show the court order and ask to be notified when an appointment is made?
The more problem solving your BF can show, the better it will play in court. For example, just tossing this out there (I haven't thought this through, but it's an example of problem-solving when a co-parent stonewalls and obstructs), what about taking BF's son to a different pediatrician independently, or asking the doctor's office after the visits to share the notes, or go in an talk to the doctor separately to hear how things went?
When these requests are denied, I was thinking we would file a contempt of court in conjunction with a motion to modify requesting 50 legal / 50 physical. No supervision, etc etc.
Contempt of court motions can pile up like parking tickets without any real consequence. In my case, it was more the pattern of contempt of court that made a dent, and even then, the nature of the contempt was a bit more directly impactful to my son's well-being. And there was also a sturdy trail of evidence.
Our strategy is contempt of court in conjunction with motion to modify as that will likely be the most cost effective option without having to go to full blown trial in order to get more visitation.
I don't think one contempt of court is going to leverage a change in visitation -- altho things could be different where you live and it's always a good idea to consult with your L.
Our cases are often about a pattern of documented behavior, especially after a temp order has been ordered. If your BF has to work his way out of a less-than ideal place, he will need to demonstrate a period of his perfect behavior and her problematic behavior, especially for things that have a negative impact on the child, at least in general terms.
My judge did care about adult to adult behaviors, but these behaviors were significant and documented, and when the judge made an explicit call to N/BPDx to cut it out, N/BPDx did not, and that bothered the judge. But in terms of changing visitation and custody, it took a lot of contempt of court motions over a long period of time, with lots of proposed solutions tossed in there (psychiatric evaluations, ordered therapy, anger management classes, parenting classes, co-parenting therapy, substance-abuse treatment) before things started to sway the judge to make meaningful changes.
It does make you nuts
I'm sorry you have to go through this.