to put this in perspective, at least from my perspective...I hope you have at least 5 walks together in the next 3 weeks and I hope you have EXACTLY ZERO discussion about "declaration of intent"..."status of the relationship"..."where is this headed"..."what are we to each other".
CHILL..enjoy a walk, maybe you only talk about the songbirds and the flowers...FOR THREE WEEKS and 5 walks.
That would be a MASSIVE victory.
Then...on week 4..."Hey...it's been fun on these walks, did you see the new steakhouse opened. My treat this Friday if you are up for it."
Maybe a different analogy. I suspect her "fun" bank account with you is empty...and the "work/hard conversation" bank account is way over drawn and collection letters have been sent out.
Only make deposits in the "fun" account for a while.
Best,
FF
I think you are soo right on this one. However, I suspect she is going to bring stuff up, if I don’t. Would it be appropriate for me to say “can we just enjoy the company for a while and not talk about that stuff?” Or does that sound too evasive?
Typically, as with most of these relationships, we tend to make up fairly quickly, and end up sleeping together often that same night. Do you know how that goes.
I get the impression that, like me, she looks for little pieces of evidence to convince her that I am up to something not so good… So if I don’t have her over in my bed within the first couple of times out, I suspect she’s probably going to start splitting again… and find something to complain about and drive herself away, because she will start thinking that I am up to something.
I remember after one of the first major splits, I told her we should just take things slowly, and she seemed to be on board with that, and gave her some comfort.
