co-depedent and asking support to move on

[Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse...]

 

 I had all good reasons to believe I was in relationship with a person with BPD and we said to go our own way.

Still... .I am hanging on and sad and I having a hard time that "dreams" are over... .still thinking facts over... .

Still longing to do the trips he payed for (the hotelvouchers are in my hands)
Still
Still still
What kind of therapie helps (me) someone who wants to hang on?
TIME?
Must I make a list of things that do work well?

[zonnebloem]

 

 I had all good reasons to believe I was in relationship with a person with BPD and we said to go our own way.

Still... .I am hanging on and sad and I having a hard time that "dreams" are over... .still thinking facts over... .

Still longing to do the trips he payed for (the hotelvouchers are in my hands)
Still
Still still
What kind of therapie helps (me) someone who wants to hang on?
TIME?
Must I make a list of things that do work well?

[married21years]

hi ZB

welcome

the key to success in my mind is working on us!

we matter our wants and desires, our BPD was like alcohol. it numbed our pain worring and taking care of them and avoided looking at ourselves.

that took most of us to our happy place we learnt in childhood where looking after other avoided our issues and problems.

we need to unlearn that learnt behavior

it isn't easy and it is a long and hard road but we need to be honest with ourselves and look at ourselves

  good luck we are all in this together

[zonnebloem]

 

Hello, thanks for the answer you gave!

I must look in the future and for August I am doing fine with my new volunteeringjob.

[married21years]

Hello, thanks for the answer you gave!

I must look in the future and for August I am doing fine with my new volunteeringjob.

good luck and try to enjoy your journey