Yes, that is an huge epiphany.
What was also a 'mind blown' moment for me was learning that water tends to seek it's own level and I had some emotional immaturity brewing in my own back yard. I, too, had poor impluse control, poor self control/self discipline, was into short term gratification. People pleasing, procastrination, the whole nine yards! Oy vey. I at one time had a job where I took care of toddlers. Thinking about their emotional level of maturity, it helped in understanding my ex. They, too, can't relate to complex emotional issues. They, too, can't understand how their actions affect others. Once I started relating their stage of development to my ex, we got along a lot better. Also made me determined to focus on my own growth and recovery. Still a work in progress but once you have a goal in mind, it's something to work towards.
