Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
May 12, 2024, 04:32:20 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Kells76, Once Removed, Turkish
Senior Ambassadors: Cat Familiar, EyesUp, SinisterComplex
  Help!   Boards   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
Books members most read
105
The High
Conflict Couple
Loving Someone with
Borderline Personality Disorder
Loving the
Self-Absorbed
Borderline Personality
Disorder Demystified

Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: not "rescuing" when it's an important appointment  (Read 391 times)
Mamadukes

*
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 28


« on: May 21, 2018, 12:31:03 PM »

Hi Dear People,

I haven't been here in quite a while. In the meantime, I will mention that I have completed the NEABPD's Family Connections 12-wk course, which I HIGHLY recommend. Life altering! https://www.borderlinepersonalitydisorder.com/family-connections/.

Last night my son had a disastrously violent episode. My question this afternoon is how to reconcile not-rescuing (taking care of his business) in a situation that seem crucially important -- where there is a lot at stake for both of us and it does not seem possible for me to step back and let things unfold. He has a second appointment with a new psychiatrist this afternoon (which, after last night, I will ask to attend with him). His treatment (and recovery work) have lapsed since he started a new job two months ago (going very well)... .and there have been at least three seriously violent episodes in that time.

I will encourage him to get up in time for this appointment, but I am arranging my life around that this afternoon. He does not respond well to alarm clocks, especially after a drinking binge. I don't see how we can tolerate any further delay in getting back to treatment.
Thoughts?

Thank you,
MamaD.
Logged
Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
Huat
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Estranged
Posts: 595


« Reply #1 on: May 21, 2018, 05:53:11 PM »

Hi Marmadukes

Indeed, you are between a rock and a hard place.  It is difficult to back off when you know this is an important appointment for your son to go to today... .a new psychiatrist... .especially important since his current mood is not stable.

When you write that "there have been at least 3 seriously violent episodes"... .are you ever in danger?

I sincerely hope all goes well today... .that he goes... .and you are able to sit in with him.  Waiting to hear how things went.

So good to read that you completed the Family Connections course and that you found it "life altering."  Good that you are here, too. Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)

Thinking of you, Mamadukes, and sending along a ((HUG).

Huat
Logged
wendydarling
Retired Staff
*
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Mother
Posts: 2701



« Reply #2 on: May 21, 2018, 08:46:45 PM »

Hey Marmadukes  

Whoa, we've missed you, lovely bean!  (bean is term of endearment in our house, family, friends)
Are you going through progression, regression points? Big changes back and forth? Please share more when you are able. I went with my gut instinct, felt my daughter out, always - that's my advice to you.

MD are you safe?

WDx  
Logged

Be kind, always and all ways ~ my BPD daughter
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife



Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!