when it boils down to not wanting t do simple things like this

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

after being dogged in text messages over the past 3 days and being told what a hateful and rude person I am.

I get a text asking me to print a picture out for her on my printer at work so she can frame it for her mom to put in her house.

My nature says print the picture because I don't mind doing favors for people but I feel like I am being used after all that crummy crap was said to me

If I do it then she sees me as useful. If I don't do it I will be hateful and rude and her opinion of me stays correct.

If I don't print it I am trying to prove a point. This sucks to me. This may sound totally ridiculous. she basically is giving me the cold shoulder unless she needs a favor from me.

[byfaith]

after being dogged in text messages over the past 3 days and being told what a hateful and rude person I am.

I get a text asking me to print a picture out for her on my printer at work so she can frame it for her mom to put in her house.

My nature says print the picture because I don't mind doing favors for people but I feel like I am being used after all that crummy crap was said to me

If I do it then she sees me as useful. If I don't do it I will be hateful and rude and her opinion of me stays correct.

If I don't print it I am trying to prove a point. This sucks to me. This may sound totally ridiculous. she basically is giving me the cold shoulder unless she needs a favor from me.

[formflier]

Print the picture but hold off on giving it to her. 

Remember this is an "in the moment" disorder... .she changes her feelings about you rapidly.

Will try to write more later.

FF

[Cat Familiar]

If I do it then she sees me as useful. If I don't do it I will be hateful and rude and her opinion of me stays correct.


This is a similar dynamic to her having such high expectations of you with her son. It's like she expects you to be the perfect "servant" and when you're just a normal human being with your own wants and needs, then she finds you lacking and paints you black.

[Lucky Jim]

Hey by faith, Sounds like manipulation to me.  Can you feel the pressure?  It's F-O-G: fear, obligation or guilt.  Suggest you pull back and do nothing until the FOG clears.  LJ

[byfaith]

Remember this is an "in the moment" disorder... .she changes her feelings about you rapidly.

This I have to remember