I feel worthless and my selfsteem is gone.
I am desperate and sometimes I feel the only solution is to end my life. At the end nobody really cares about me
Collaguazo,
To me it sounds like you are extremely upset and are in an incredibly painful and upsetting situation to the point of where you want to end it all. My friend, you are in crisis, as you feel as though you can no longer bear the pain of what used to be your borderline relationship.
Even though it feels quite hopeless to be in this situation, there is always hope, no matter how distant it might seem at the moment. We are here to listen to you, and offer emotional support.
In your very first post last year, you mentioned that you had a doctor who was able to recognize BPD in your girlfriend and he was treating you for depression. I highly recommend, with urgency, to reach out to your doctor in this matter, so he can help you get you the help you need.
If you need to talk to someone outside of your doctor's normal office hours, please call the suicide/crisis hotline in your country - here is a list of these numbers at
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines We care about you. Be sure to do any kind of self-care right now, as it sounds like you need to do this for yourself.
Take care.
SD
