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How to communicate after a contentious divorce... Following a contentious divorce and custody battle, there are often high emotion and tensions between the parents. Research shows that constant and chronic conflict between the parents negatively impacts the children. The children sense their parents anxiety in their voice, their body language and their parents behavior. Here are some suggestions from Dean Stacer on how to avoid conflict.
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Author Topic: Today's convo and additional drama  (Read 374 times)
JerryRG
********
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1832


« on: July 15, 2016, 12:43:23 PM »

Me
How is my son?

Her
He's doing great. Bored waiting for daycare.  But... .did u not tell peace lutheran about his food and milk allergy?

Me
I told them everything they needed to know

Her
Werid... he had a reaction yesterday like a ... .Penicillin rash (google it ).benadryl helped and is way better now. I fed him cheese ravioli stuff for supper which made it worse so I'm getting him retested because it's more then just milk... .certain cheeses plus wheat or soy... .but he's good now

I loved his daycare. He didn't eanna leave me til a certain teacher said his name and i couldn't even get him to hug me goodbye.

Me
He really enjoys daycare and I believe it is the best thing for him.

Her
They showed me the bills you owe. (Son) now has $40 left til next month cuz I split the bill in half and paid $60 ... .or I mean... I will today ... .

Me
Ok, I appriciate you helping with costs

Her
It was like $59 if we split it so... .yea idk. It worries me cuz he needs wipes and diapers over here but... .God has this and (son) loves it

Me
Yes, nothing to worry about

Her
I know u said 40... .but we are his parents... .if we allow god to work with us, (son) gets what he deserves

Me
Indeed

Her
Would you like to see him today? I was worried about him and checked on him every hour  (for no reason because I'm a worry freak) and i am super warn out but if not, I will take a short nap after I visit with hyvee for a job before I have to pick him up

Me
I'm getting a full week in work so I will get the DC assistance

I will take (son) after 1:30

Her
Sweet. Well they only pay SO much... .sometimes his hours will go over and if in agreement we shall split coats

He goes to to daycare 11 to 3

Me
Ok, I can pick him up early and I will call and see how he's doing. If he's doing well I will wait until 3

Me
Back to work

Her
He napped there for 1.5 half yesterday ... .and there nap time is after lunch so... .I think 2 pm would be good

Me
Ok

Her
Ok I will let them know.  The bill will be paid $60 worth... .it shows that  we aren't just play in the daycare either so... .cya later

Me
Yes, they expect our cooperation and it is the best for (son)

Her
He didn't want to leave yesterday Laugh out loud (click to insert in post). Was waiting by door but I was a little late, I do not have money for a new tire so donut is on there but it was a very hard day cuz it's was like... .tire foe transportation for (son) or daycare cost firsr... .donut can only b on there two qeeks

Me - just an observation.
(This part makes me want to cry, she's seeking validation from our son, so sad for all of us)

Anyway ya... .I love (son) so much  and am thankful he's in daycare he talks so well. For a 2 yr old to tell his mom that she is pretty, yea daycare can have all mommas mulah! Such a sweetie he is. We bonded so well the last few days... .he Def is bored with me now ... .ttyl let me know of plans change for pick up

Pick him up around 230 or by 3. He naps until 230

-----------
Me - Observation (son's doctor told me he's ok to have milk and lactose intolerance does not require emergency assistance)
-----------

Her
(Son) was given milk yesterday and it's ok u didn't tell then mistakes happen but do know we almost had to call 911. I am getting him into dr about more allergy tests but I'm meeting daycare people to go through everything. His teacher was upset at herself for given him milk... .

I said it's ok it didn't happen til after supper so it was part of the cheese he had for dinner plus the milk, he's alive he's good the rash is gone but plz no milk. I'm getting his allergy list from Dr office and I Will meet w them this afternoon ... .

Have a great afternoon with him... if he doesn't gall asleep by 730 I will pick him up for the church movie deal ... .and allow u to go too ur mtg Saturday morning and may have him back after if you'd like.


Me,

She's so all over the map, and exagerating the milk allergy thing.
Y
Using BIFF as much as I know how, I think I did well, she just can't help throwing in all her troubles and earlier told me she wasn't feeling well. This is tame compared to our typical conversations

Think I did ok?
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bunny4523
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 438


« Reply #1 on: July 15, 2016, 01:16:59 PM »

It also sounds like she is trying reconnect with you. Maybe she isn't getting attention at home.  She reminds me alot of my boyfriend's ex... .with the all over the place texts.  One minute she wants to take him back to court to get full custody because her daughters deserve better (they have shared 50/50 custody for over 3 years) then she is letting him pick up the kids early and says "ok they would really enjoy that".  not fun, I feel for you.  Enjoy it while she is calm and quiet. Try to ignore the storm cause you know that is next or buy a really cool looking umbrella. ha ha

Bunny
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JerryRG
********
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1832


« Reply #2 on: July 15, 2016, 01:23:11 PM »

Lol, thanks bunny4523

I'm learning and she acts like she's in awe that our son needs daycare and transition into preschool. Our son talks a lot in his own language but I'm 100% sure he does not call mommy pretty. Oh well... .yes expect the storm to come, always does eventually.
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JerryRG
********
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1832


« Reply #3 on: July 15, 2016, 02:23:57 PM »

No one gave her more attention then I did, too much of a good thing for her and not getting anything in return except the occasional tidbits just enough to keep my heart beating.

They cannot take what we don't give them, I just had this misconception that eventually she would give me something other than her disorder back to me.
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