Saw my uBPD/NPD ex gf yesterday for the first time in about 8 months

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

Had a surreal situation happen yesterday when I was running some stairs (385 ft) at my local park when I ran past a woman running the other direction who looked like my ex gf.  I wasn't expecting it, so I ran past barely looking and not saying a word.  During my last ascent I ran by her again and realized it was my ex gf and she mutter a faint "hi", but I just kept going not saying a word.  Not to beat the girl up, but wow she looked like crap - rail skinny and pail compared to the athletic and pretty lady I once knew.  I think about her now and then, and at times picture her in my mind as hot, sexy and athletic.  Talk about a reality check!

I left the r/s about 16 months ago and have been in a happy and healthy r/s with a fantastic lady for the past seven months.  My life has changed so dramatically!  Maybe the way I saw my ex look yesterday was a mix of reality and that I no longer find her attractive at all anymore?  Kind of like wearing a new pair of glasses where everything suddenly looks different.  Again, I'm not trying to diss my ex gf rather just processing how weird it was to see her like that.  It also demonstrated to me that my feeling that she'd move on with life and suddenly her life would be perfect was pretty irrational.  Doesn't look like that happened.  For the first time, I can honestly say I feel bad for her.  That's where the feeling ends, which is good and healthy.  Anyway, thought I would share this with you all.

[Madison66]

Had a surreal situation happen yesterday when I was running some stairs (385 ft) at my local park when I ran past a woman running the other direction who looked like my ex gf.  I wasn't expecting it, so I ran past barely looking and not saying a word.  During my last ascent I ran by her again and realized it was my ex gf and she mutter a faint "hi", but I just kept going not saying a word.  Not to beat the girl up, but wow she looked like crap - rail skinny and pail compared to the athletic and pretty lady I once knew.  I think about her now and then, and at times picture her in my mind as hot, sexy and athletic.  Talk about a reality check!

I left the r/s about 16 months ago and have been in a happy and healthy r/s with a fantastic lady for the past seven months.  My life has changed so dramatically!  Maybe the way I saw my ex look yesterday was a mix of reality and that I no longer find her attractive at all anymore?  Kind of like wearing a new pair of glasses where everything suddenly looks different.  Again, I'm not trying to diss my ex gf rather just processing how weird it was to see her like that.  It also demonstrated to me that my feeling that she'd move on with life and suddenly her life would be perfect was pretty irrational.  Doesn't look like that happened.  For the first time, I can honestly say I feel bad for her.  That's where the feeling ends, which is good and healthy.  Anyway, thought I would share this with you all.

[Loosestrife]

I think how you feel is pretty normal and it helps now you are happy with someone else.

It reminded me of a time when this happened to me in the past - and the important part is that we can get over these people and there is more than one person for everyone. Thank you for posting