Mom has BPD

[1524]

I impressed that I haven't thrown my phone against a wall yet.  Her new tactic is that she will only answer if I call her.  She won't return my phone calls.  She doesn't want to disturb me.  The last time we spoke, I mentioned that I was relaxing in the backyard.  I didn't want to describe my whole day, just relax.  So now, she won't return my calls. 

[Panda39]

Hi 1524,

Not returning calls has got to be frustrating... .game playing   Is it urgent that you talk with her?  Or can you just wait her out and see if she calls you?

Panda39

[Turkish]

I got a bit similar to this.  I told my mom over and over that of she called I'd call her back since I had so many free cell minutes.  Then it was "you've got a lot going on,  I didn't want to bother you." Finally I told her that the phone works both ways.  I was tired of hearing, "so you remembered you still have a mother?" And the like.  Throwing the ball into her court helped for a while,  of not only to have her call me,  but also to relieve my guilt. 

Dr. Craig Childress refers to the pwBPD as "an abused child, all grown up." That helped me to put my interactions into perspective.