Hi Beezle,
Your posts here have resonated with me. My H of 10 years filed for divorce in August, and I was emotionally devastated, i.e.: sliding down the wall, crying kind of devastated.
Luckily, I've been seeing my therapist/coach for the past seven years, and in between crying, I told her that, given my age (I'm in my 60s), and given the need to heal from all the s**t my H put me through, I'd be 70 before I'd even want to date, let alone remarry.
Her response? To work on my healing as the divorce process goes forward, and who knows, maybe I'll be ready to date the second the ink dries on that final decree.
My response? To go out onto dating sites for older people to see if I can even attract someone at my age. Kind of got hung up on it, actually. Then, after I reassured myself that I was indeed still capable of attracting men to me, I realized, as you seem to have realized, that maybe there'll be a relationship in my future, and maybe there won't. And I'm okay with that.
I have friends, kids, grandkids, and more animals than any person ought to have, and I am content being un-partnered for now.
TMD
TMD
I'm happy for you.
It's alright to know validation of oneself is a quest for inner peace by looking within instead of outward at material items or other human beings.
I've made a fair share of mistakes, but now learning from them and appreciate the battle scars.
My ex wife is remarried. I'm happy for her. I was so desperate to validate myself I latched onto a woman that unfortunately suffers from a PD.
I learned a lot from the experience. Never knew anything about BPD or even considered myself narcissistic capable. Now I know what I need to work on for myself and my remaining life. At 57 I thought I was being a gentleman to my exBPD. She was 45, gorgeous blonde that I treated like a trophy, not a human with emotional challenges.
It all works out for us if we are willing to look inward at ourselves.
TWD , I bet your a gorgeous woman, inside and out, that will attract men when your ready. If we lived in the same town and I met a woman with your self awareness? Well, it would be a nice conversation. Good luck.
