One thing I have been curious about however. When they 'ping', do the pings get bigger/more obvious/direct or even bring on Recycle attempts or do they fade with time? What has been your experience?
That's a really good question - and I would suggest that you start a new thread on that one. You might get some success in hearing a variety of stories.
My guess is that it will depend. With me, they started small, escalated, hit a peak (she wrote some pretty threatening stuff) - went dormant for six weeks - showed up at my place of work with personal effects - my lawyer sent her a cease and desist - she went ballistic - and by last account has been spiraling down ever since.
The key in all of this is to work on yourself - and then it really doesn't matter - right? Of course, it would help do that if you could know what to expect. So I found I needed to work on getting strong daily - and I still do. My relationship was particularly emotionally abusive.
Hope this helps.
Rev