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Author Topic: would this booklet be validating as a gift ?  (Read 390 times)
lemon flower
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« on: July 23, 2014, 10:40:24 AM »

my BP-friend FINALLY got institutionalised today... .he was on a waiting list for many months so it was big time  Smiling (click to insert in post)

he left rather happy, hoping that this will be the start of his new life.

I didn't get the chance to say goodbye, and he said he didn't want me to visit him because he doesn't want me to see him sitting amongst "those morrons"   (he's always very concerned about what kind of image I keep of him when I leave)

I was thinking of sending him a postcard with a nice text on it but yesterday I was in a bookshop and I came across a small "fill in" booklet which I rather liked: each page consisting one line you have to complete that is telling something nice about the person you give it to  Smiling (click to insert in post)

it has phrases like:

- what I really like about you is... .

- you are very talented in... .

- I remember we had a nice time when... .

- you 're very sexy when wearing... .

- you are so funny when... .

etc... .

I was spontaneously thinking this could be an upper for his self-image and something to hold on when things are going bad, but with pwBPD you never know do you ?

does this sound like a good idea or do you remark any hidden traps here ?

could it be invalidating for someone with  low self-esteem who is facing a rather turbulent and probably stressfull new episode in his life ?

what if they keep him there for a longer time than he thinks, could it be sounding sarcastic in his ears in the given situation ?

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Rapt Reader
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« Reply #1 on: July 23, 2014, 12:05:29 PM »

does this sound like a good idea or do you remark any hidden traps here ?

could it be invalidating for someone with  low self-esteem who is facing a rather turbulent and probably stressfull new episode in his life ?

what if they keep him there for a longer time than he thinks, could it be sounding sarcastic in his ears in the given situation ?

Those are all good questions, triss, and some of them could really be applicable. I also wonder if he is allowed to receive mail while in this program? I do know that during my adult (37) son's stay at a Dual Diagnosis Center last year (he was there for its very intensive, In-Patient 21-day program), we were not only not allowed to send him any mail, but we actually couldn't call and talk to him, either. He was only given phone privileges after 2 weeks, and he had to call us; we were not allowed to contact him in any way. Do you know the rules of this place?

You are really a very good friend, and I share your joy in his finally deciding to get help, finding it, and then accepting it. Those are the first hurdles he's overcome, to his recovery and a better life. It's wonderful that you've been able to witness that, and I truly hope he finds himself--and a new understanding of life--while there 

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lemon flower
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« Reply #2 on: July 26, 2014, 02:21:30 PM »

Those are all good questions, triss, and some of them could really be applicable. I also wonder if he is allowed to receive mail while in this program? I do know that during my adult (37) son's stay at a Dual Diagnosis Center last year (he was there for its very intensive, In-Patient 21-day program), we were not only not allowed to send him any mail, but we actually couldn't call and talk to him, either. He was only given phone privileges after 2 weeks, and he had to call us; we were not allowed to contact him in any way. Do you know the rules of this place?

at the moment he is in a crisis-intervention unit to detox from his addictions, later on he will be taken in a more appropriate unit (if he stays there ofcourse, because he came in voluntarily so if he decides to quit he can just leave)

he is not allowed to have his mobile phone with him neither does he has internetconnection but he can call me with the fixed phone from the hospital

actually he allready called me to ask if I could pass by with a pair of slippers so apparently he can receive visitors as well (no more talking about me staying away, haha  Smiling (click to insert in post))

I think I'll wait with that booklet, maybe later on... .
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