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Author Topic: I tried to access the "healing" board  (Read 633 times)
tryintogetby
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Relationship status: Married to a wonderful man who loves me the way I am. (gasp!)
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« on: January 18, 2013, 09:56:41 AM »

Hi, I'm an old timer from way back when, and when I tried to access the "healing" board to ask a question, it didn't give me a "new topic" button.  When I tried to "post a poll" it told me I didn't have permission to access that board.  Um... .  ?  Is there some new policy that I didn't know about?
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Want2know
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
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« Reply #1 on: January 18, 2013, 11:42:53 AM »

Hi, I'm an old timer from way back when, and when I tried to access the "healing" board to ask a question, it didn't give me a "new topic" button.  When I tried to "post a poll" it told me I didn't have permission to access that board.  Um... .  ?  Is there some new policy that I didn't know about?

Yes... .  see below.  Please contact me and let me know which board is best suited to your situation.


[L5]  Coping and Healing from a BPD Parent, Sibling, or Inlaw

Personal healing and managing of a relationship with a family member suffering from BPD.


This new board will focus on relationship tools (communication, values/boundaries, etc) and working through the 21 steps.  Members will be allowed to vent as part of problem solving or part of the “remembering” process, but random ranting with no direction will be discouraged. Members will be encourage to look at their role in the cycle of conflict. The intention is to emerge from victim to survivor.

[L3] Ending a Relationship with an abusive Parent, Relative, or Inlaw with a PD

Exiting a toxic relationship and focusing on personal recovery


This new board will focus on how to exit your relationship in the most healthy way and how to mourn and process the loss.  This new board will also focus on working through the 21 steps and self analysis, recognizing that anyone growing up i a dysfunctional family likely has developed coping skills that worked in that environment that are not well suited outside of that environment...




The boards will operate separately - separate membership and separate healing platform.  Members can post on one or the other, but not both.  Members can transfer between boards by request to a staff member.

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“The path to heaven doesn't lie down in flat miles. It's in the imagination with which you perceive this world, and the gestures with which you honor it." ~ Mary Oliver
bluecup11
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« Reply #2 on: March 22, 2013, 08:57:15 AM »

I wonder, is there any chance of a third, "undecided" board for family members?

We all have different specifics but the sibling relationship might warrant one.

For example, in my case, I'm at a point of needing to be NC with my BPDsis for my own mental health. It's not my ideal but neither is her active BPD. It just is what it is. However, she lives with my mother, and I'm undecided about my mother. Sometimes I want to run from the hills from them both but in general, at least for now, I'm trying to maintain a relationship with my mother. Under the circumstances this is very complicated.

Anyway - I'm currently assigned to the L3 ending a relationship board that I think is the NC board - I'm not sure why I am - and I can't post on the L5  "healing from" board.  Neither really seems to fit.  I think going NC is not an easy, quick decision so it seems natural that we would vacillate between boards just as we would in coming to this decision.

Just some thoughts - if posting is restricted to the two existing boards, maybe a third could be created where the posting is not restricted?
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Clearmind
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
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« Reply #3 on: March 22, 2013, 05:22:12 PM »

Thanks for your suggestions and it is something we will consider for the future. One practical matter is determining if we have sufficient traffic in that category to keep a board active and dynamic.

Additionally, we still have our hands full with the splitting of the ACOBPD into two boards in October.  A new board requires lessons, research to develop the lessons, recruiting and training staff, and building a base of knowledgeable senior mentors.  We are still deep in that process.

The ACOBPD group is the second largest group at bpdfamily.com and serving that community well is a high priority.

CM
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