Get back to get my stuff?

[Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse...]

I broke up and did not see my Y for two months now. I went back to my own apartment.

He insisted on me getting my stuff.

Last time I tried that (two months ago) we got in a row that I could only escape by running out of the home with a suitcase full of stuff. I was threatened with a large kitchen knife. I tried to soothe by asking "why do you threaten me". Apparently this was because he did not threaten me, I threatened him with leaving.

I tried to calm him and myself and got the hell out.

So I wasn't very happy to take what was mine upto now. I got this message that he would throw my stuff away a week ago and I could comfort myself with that thought. Now I have another message that I have to come take my stuff, and that it is 4 bags. ":)on 't tell me it is worth nothing, what we had is worth something to me" he said. I did not react. After a few hours I got his cynical message "Oh very mature!" But I did not react.

I won't go back. That is for sure. Should I say that? Or is it best to say nothing and hope he will lose interest?

I know, that is just riding my guilt button but it works. :'( I feel guilty. But I'm not going back there again. I may find myself killed if I do.  Should I respond that I am not going to get my stuff?

[zkirtz]

I broke up and did not see my Y for two months now. I went back to my own apartment.

He insisted on me getting my stuff.

Last time I tried that (two months ago) we got in a row that I could only escape by running out of the home with a suitcase full of stuff. I was threatened with a large kitchen knife. I tried to soothe by asking "why do you threaten me". Apparently this was because he did not threaten me, I threatened him with leaving.

I tried to calm him and myself and got the hell out.

So I wasn't very happy to take what was mine upto now. I got this message that he would throw my stuff away a week ago and I could comfort myself with that thought. Now I have another message that I have to come take my stuff, and that it is 4 bags. ":)on 't tell me it is worth nothing, what we had is worth something to me" he said. I did not react. After a few hours I got his cynical message "Oh very mature!" But I did not react.

I won't go back. That is for sure. Should I say that? Or is it best to say nothing and hope he will lose interest?

I know, that is just riding my guilt button but it works. :'( I feel guilty. But I'm not going back there again. I may find myself killed if I do.  Should I respond that I am not going to get my stuff?

[Aussie0zborn]

Your safety is the most important thing here.  Are your things worth anything to YOU? If the answer is no, just leave them.  If you need to go back, go only with the police - ask them to accompany you to "keep the peace". Then get a restaining order.