silent treatment

[VIDEO: "What is parental alienation?"]

 Hey guys, basically I've been dating a woman and have a child with her and she fits the waif borderline personality disorder. She was make fun of me defend other guys and give me minor silent treatment. Well she moved in with me in January, she would lie to me and then when I would find out the truth and confront her she would always have some lame excuse. She wouldn't work i paid for everything! She always told me she wasn't the type to fall in love but she loved me. Or so she said. Then magically she fell in love over night. She never raged she would just stare at me. The sex was out of this world. But I kept catching her in lies. I told her she needed to move out. She begged and pleaded and promised to change. On April 1st it was a perfect day, we talked about our wedding, made love that night, the next morning She got up with me to get ready for work, She sit in the bathroom with me while I showered and talked to me, made my lunch for the day and kissed me goodbye. When I got home she was gone and so was my baby. She deactivated her Facebook changed her number I've not heard one word in 9 weeks. She have driven by my house twice now. But I was not home. My neighbor told me. This can't be normal. Is this silent treatment? Do they normally come back? I'm all to pieces.

[hurting300]

 Hey guys, basically I've been dating a woman and have a child with her and she fits the waif borderline personality disorder. She was make fun of me defend other guys and give me minor silent treatment. Well she moved in with me in January, she would lie to me and then when I would find out the truth and confront her she would always have some lame excuse. She wouldn't work i paid for everything! She always told me she wasn't the type to fall in love but she loved me. Or so she said. Then magically she fell in love over night. She never raged she would just stare at me. The sex was out of this world. But I kept catching her in lies. I told her she needed to move out. She begged and pleaded and promised to change. On April 1st it was a perfect day, we talked about our wedding, made love that night, the next morning She got up with me to get ready for work, She sit in the bathroom with me while I showered and talked to me, made my lunch for the day and kissed me goodbye. When I got home she was gone and so was my baby. She deactivated her Facebook changed her number I've not heard one word in 9 weeks. She have driven by my house twice now. But I was not home. My neighbor told me. This can't be normal. Is this silent treatment? Do they normally come back? I'm all to pieces.

[woodsposse]

 

Although it is under the circumstance you are going through right now, I welcome you here to the board.  You are in the right place and I know you will find the support  and some of the answers you are seeking.  I know the pain, frustration and confusion that you are going through (first hand) - and a lot of members will be able to share their stories with you and you will know you are not alone.

It can't be easy to have had such a nice night and day, have everything seem to be going one way only to get home and have the whole world turned upside down.  Is it normal?  Sadly in a case with a pwPD... . yes it can fall within the range of what they are capable of doing.  I can't speak for if they 'normally' come back or not (everyone is different) - but I would hope to focus you on some of the more immediate issues, such as the safety and welfare of your child.

If you haven't seen her in 9 weeks, I take it you haven't seen your child either?  Do you now if they are alright?  Did she just leave and take your child or does she have custody to be able to do this?  I'm hoping you can be in a position to ensure the safety and wellness of both your child and yourself - and deal with the your s/o as a separate issue.

Do you not have anyway of contacting her?

[hurting300]

We were going to add my name to the birth certificate that Friday. And no I have no way of contacting her at all.

[woodsposse]

We were going to add my name to the birth certificate that Friday. And no I have no way of contacting her at all.

Oh I am so sorry to hear this.  This has got to have you beside yourself.

I'm no expert on the matter, and I'm not sure which part of the world you are in - but my concern would be for the safety of my child in this instance and what the legal ramifications are for her running off with the child. 

I am going to suggest, if you are up to it, to head over to the Family law, divorce, and custody board

https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?board=10.0

I'm sure the members there may be able to offer their insights on some things you can do for this type of situation.  BPD or not, you are your childs other parent and it is highly unacceptable for the child and you to have her just run off with the child and you have no idea where they are.

I wish you the best and just know we are all here to support you.

[hurting300]

I'm actually from Georgia, I hired a top attorney too fight for me. Thank you for your replies.