Interactive Exercise_help please

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

Exactly 6 weeks ago, trying to "please" exbfBPD, i allowed him to schedule an amazing beach weekend at beach resort nearby. Yes, he used my name (as he always did) as if we were married as his probation disallows him to have any credit. He also signed us up for a time share tour so that we would get a free night: that would be tonight. I'm certain he believes, as he always does, that he is ENTITLED to use the free night voucher with my name on it; after all he's been using me, my money, and my credit for over a year. So, I did a screen shot of his text message from 6 weeks ago when he write that the reservation could be rescheduled if we needed to cancel. My name is on the voucher, so he will need to lie at check in, and I confirmed his name is on the reservation. He also owes me a large sum of money; says he doesn't have enough money to survive (while making a six figure salary). And he has given me silent treatment for over 3 weeks since I asked him to pay to me what he had committed. My best girl friend thinks we should be on hand at the hotel when he tries to check in using my voucher OR he may have a "new toy" attempt to check in as me. Since he went to prison for fraud for 3 years, this will be child's play for him to talk his way in. He will neither answer nor acknowledge my text asking him about the reservation. What would you do?

[Loveofhislife]

Exactly 6 weeks ago, trying to "please" exbfBPD, i allowed him to schedule an amazing beach weekend at beach resort nearby. Yes, he used my name (as he always did) as if we were married as his probation disallows him to have any credit. He also signed us up for a time share tour so that we would get a free night: that would be tonight. I'm certain he believes, as he always does, that he is ENTITLED to use the free night voucher with my name on it; after all he's been using me, my money, and my credit for over a year. So, I did a screen shot of his text message from 6 weeks ago when he write that the reservation could be rescheduled if we needed to cancel. My name is on the voucher, so he will need to lie at check in, and I confirmed his name is on the reservation. He also owes me a large sum of money; says he doesn't have enough money to survive (while making a six figure salary). And he has given me silent treatment for over 3 weeks since I asked him to pay to me what he had committed. My best girl friend thinks we should be on hand at the hotel when he tries to check in using my voucher OR he may have a "new toy" attempt to check in as me. Since he went to prison for fraud for 3 years, this will be child's play for him to talk his way in. He will neither answer nor acknowledge my text asking him about the reservation. What would you do?

[Suspicious1]

If the reservation was in my name, I'd probably just call up and cancel it.

[Suspicious1]

*Or* turn up first and check in. Take the reservation.

[Loveofhislife]

The curious cat in me really wants to show up with my girl friend. And I love the thought of getting there early and taking the reservation ourselves. His only reply to my queries about the reservation, "I'm glad you were able to get your car looked at." No sequitur or just typical pwBPD crazy making? Since I have an attorney listing his instances of financial fraud for my case, it wouldn't hurt to catch him red handed.

[Recooperating]

I would spear myself the added drama and cancel it, or reschedule to another date and then go yourself!

[Loveofhislife]

Recooperate and Suspicious: thank you! I believe I will spare myself the grief along with sparing him the attention he would no doubt interpret as supply! He physically has the voucher, so I could stir up a firestorm. Oh yeah:that's HIS role!

[Recooperating]

Glad to hear it loveofhislife! Unfortunately we ALWAYS will have to be the "bigger" person in these matters... .Sucks big time, but safes is a lot of headaches!

Enjoy your weekend!

[tired-of-it-all]

I agree with the others who say cancel the reservation.  Frankly, I would call the police and have him charged with fraud associated with my name.  You may also have a case for theft by conversion if his debt to you is from a misuse of funds.

I am a big believer in keeping business business and letting the police do the work for me.  It cuts through a lot of bulli___.