Thank you Turkish.
Yes my reference is the support system - family and friends invalidating one's feelings.
Be glad you're out" "It could have been worse, thank god you're safe" "Now he's someone else's problem" "There's someone better out there for you"
As Turkish points out
Saying, "you're better off," or "she was terrible; I knew it from the beginning," and the like are invalidating. They don't acknowledge your feelings of either anger, or perhaps residual love or at least attachment.
It hurts when our feelings aren't acknowledged.
Got it,Thanks.It hurt many many times when she did not validate many of my feelings.It's kinda sad because I validated her all the time.
I may have dodged a bullet here with this woman.I may not see it clearly yet.I am an emotional kinda guy with a huge heart.She was kinda like a tough chic.
I missed a red flag when I seen how she was not even emotional with the dog or her own daughter.I was more loving and emotional with her daughter and the dog.I also validated all of them too.
Pretty scary she can't be emotional or validate her own daughter and love puppie dog.
