That's awful, Thelonghaul.
How is your 11 year old doing? What a scary experience for him, and for you. Our kids certainly do experience a lot of trauma for their young years. There are some articles on the Lessons to the right ----> about helping kids deal with trauma. Or you can scroll down and read that article here:
https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=182254.msg1331459#msg1331459Court-ordered counseling is awful. I was able to get out of mine because it was only a *deal* between the lawyers. I asked the counselor if she could guarantee my safety and she said no, and that was that.
Your judge sounds awful. I know it's a lot of expense, but is it possible to appeal? Unless you are in a state where marijuana is legal, a drug is a drug is a drug. Some days I can't believe how much of our lives comes down to the judge.
The unfortunate thing is that your H is likely to continue the same behavior, so it will probably be a matter of time before you are filing for another emergency order. Are the rest of your kids doing ok right now?
Glad to hear you have your own therapist to help you through all of this.