Feeling down and invalidated :(

[Hadlee]

I'm having such a crap time of it today.  I feel totally invalidated after talking to a couple of friends regarding the latest Facebook friend request from a 'random' person, which is more thank likely my BPD friend.  I am angry... .I am sad... .I feel lost.

I understand my friends saying to just ignore the request, don't worry about it, let it go and move on.  I get it, but it's not that easy.  They just don't understand at all.  I feel like I have a stalker on my hands.  And once again, I feel like I'm the crazy one.  The actions by the BPD may be relatively harmless, but it makes no difference to me right now.  It's still upsetting and confusing.

I'm now having a pity party for one... .feeling very sorry for myself, which is frustrating as well   The BPD has got to me AGAIN and it's so damn annoying. 

Sorry for this being such a downer of a post.

[Blimblam]

Hadlee

What is it your friends don't understand?

[Hadlee]

Hey Blimblam

What they don't understand is how receiving the latest FB friend request had impacted my feelings.  They don't think it's a big deal, and seem to think that I should be laughing it off, rather than being angry and upset about it.  They say, "she's crazy, just ignore it and move on."  I get that they think that cause it's not happening to them.  Doesn't make me feel any better though.

I really am being a sook about this, I know   I came away from talking to them feeling like I am a complete moron and idiot for being affected by it.

[Blimblam]

Is it a big deal to you?

[Hadlee]

Yeah it is.

[Blimblam]

Why is it a big deal to you?

[Blimblam]

I'm sorry your feeling down

[Hadlee]

It's a big deal to me because it's happening to me.  It's not happening to our mutual friends, or my friends, it's just me.  I find it creepy, confusing, and I don't understand why she is doing it.  

[Blimblam]

How would you feel if the pwBPD just left you alone completely?

[Hadlee]

Going on how I have vented in this thread... .I think the answer to that is obvious

[Recooperating]

Hi hadlee,

Im so sorry you feel like this and I completely understand your frustration.

I understand that getting a friend request like that is confusing and bothersome. Its an attempt to invasion of your privacy and yet another trigger to set you back in healing. Im truely sorry you're experiencing this. Try to take your power back! Set your privacy setting in a way that only friends of friends can send you requests. This will make it harder for any bogus profile to bother you. Set all your posts to privat so nobody can see what you are up to except your friends. Instead of having a pity party, take power back and make sure to prevent it in the future!

As far as your friends, they can't understand it, cause they haven't been through it. They can try to understand, but they will never fully grasp how a BPD relationship impacts your life. Dont be angry or dissapointed by them, I am sure they mean well. My friends dont understand, they tell me to get over it already and start dating again. I know they want whats best for me, but it just doesnt work like that. To them you just got a friend request from an unknown person... .Happens all the time right? You just decline and thats it! Before this experience, you might have thought the same? They dont understand the PTSD the hypertension nor the anxiety we are left with. I have never broken my leg... .I understand it must hurt, but i dont know the exact feeling... .I come here for validation and understanding I have no expactations of my friends regarding this. They love me, they try but they cant ever fully grasp it. Thats fine. If I have no expactations, i wont be dissapointed.

You have every right to feel the way you feel! Hope you feel better soon!  

[Hadlee]

Thankyou Recooperating   Your message made me cry   Only because it's a relief to have someone understand this crazy ride!

I'll go and change the privacy now to prevent any further requests

Thanks once again