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Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits. Practicing lawyer, Senior Family Mediator, and former Licensed Clinical Social Worker with twelve years’ experience and an expert on navigating the Family Court process.
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Author Topic: What to do when she wont see the kids?  (Read 441 times)
KaishaMikasa
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 86



« on: April 08, 2016, 07:01:44 PM »

I have a question regarding co-parenting?  My stbxw had the kids while I was out of town on a business trip for 4 days. During that time she sent them to my house to play and just let them sleep at her place.  Now don't get me wrong my oldest is 17 and can drive but then she was supposed to go to dinner with them this week and cancelled?  So my question is do I encourage them to see her or stay out of the matter.  I think the oldest Was bothered by it but not my youngest.
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Turkish
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Relationship status: "Divorced"/abandoned by SO in Feb 2014; Mother with BPD, PTSD, Depression and Anxiety: RIP in 2021.
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« Reply #1 on: April 08, 2016, 11:37:01 PM »

It's not your job to show (parent?) the kids' mother to be a good parent. In my situation, I walk a fine line here, but it's only when my Ex asks me things on occasion. Focus on how the kids feel.

Did you talk to your 17yo about it, or was it something you were hesitant to engage?
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    “For the strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack.” ― Rudyard Kipling
hope2727
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
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« Reply #2 on: April 09, 2016, 01:50:49 PM »

Keep excellent records with all the time and date stamps you can. Then do nothing else. If you ever come to heads over custody you will have evidence of poor parenting choices. She is an adult. Her actions have consequences.

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KaishaMikasa
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
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« Reply #3 on: April 12, 2016, 03:45:09 PM »

I have not gone into detailed conversations with my 17 yr old about it.  I have told him that she may be busy or maybe she isn't feeling well.  He said he just thinks its sad.  The youngest seems to be fine with everything but does dread going over there sometimes.  I am keeping records but honestly I don't think she will every ask for more time.  I do think they need to see her and keep a relationship with her as long as she is not causing them stress.
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