Suffering

[KME Mom]

I have an adult child with BPD. She is very extreme (screams/curses) when she is home and then leaves for long periods of time. Whenever she calls, it is for money and she is dealing with substance abuse. Tried committing suicide several times over the years. My heart is breaking!

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Kwamina]

Hi KME Mom,

I am very sorry you are experiencing these problems with your daughter. BPD is a difficult disorder and it is very sad that some people wit BPD have suicidal tendencies and sometimes make actual suicide attempts. That's a horrible thing to have to go through as a parent. What happened when your daughter made those attempts as far as support? Did she get help from a therapist or psychiatrist to help her manage her difficult thoughts and emotions?

Your daughter is also dealing with substance abuse. Does she live with you when she doesn't leave for those long periods of time?

To help you navigate this difficult situation, I encourage you to take a look at some material we have here that can help you assess your safety situation and create a family crisis plan:

Safety First

Develop a Family Crisis Safety Plan When a family member has Borderline Personality Disorder

How long has your daughter been exhibiting BPD traits? Has she been officially diagnosed with this disorder and/or ever received any targeted treatment for her BPD?

Take care