Husband has BPD been together 15 years

[LovingBPD]

Not even sure where to start… im just loosing it, not literally but you know what i mean right? Loving and living with someone with BPD has been the most horrific experience ive ever been through and im a former addict been through A LOT in my life and this has been sooooooo draining and physically and mentally and emptionally taxing. I cant do it anymore… i cant be told im useless anymore i cant be his “mother” anymore… having to literally do everything for him to make sure he takes his meds and make sure hes the best version of himself just so he can beat me down … weve got three kids together.. im tired… i don’t know im not sure what im looking for here. Just need someone to talk to. Lying to everyone sround me so that he doesnt sound like a COMPLETE piece of crap is so tiring. Its all so tiring….

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Pook075]

First off, welcome to the family!  I can relate to so much of what you shared; my marriage to a BPD wife lasted 23 years and we had a BPD daughter in the process.  I was so drained of energy for so long that I had completely forgot how to be myself.

Tell us how we can help- are there certain patterns you keep seeing?  Or circular arguments that keep coming up?  Talk it out a little bit while we wait for the rest of the community to chime in.  You're among friends here that understand, so you don't have to hide anything in order to avoid the judgement.  It's also a great place to just let out a good rant!

Again, welcome!  I'm so glad you found us!