I didn't know what was going on until I started to see a T

[Naohio81]

I have an ex girlfriend that I was with for over 5 years and we had alot of ups and downs the last 3 years. I honestly didn't know what was going on. Till I started to see a therapist after our last break up. I really love her and still want to be with her but don't Know what to do. I just need to know some advice from some people that have been down this path as far as how to deal with BPD and how to try to get help for her and what to expect from treatment for BPD.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[CryWolf]

First off I would like to give you a sincere welcome to our community,Naohio
 
It takes a lot of courage to come front and share your experience and even ask for help. This place has helped me and others tremendously in our situations. Whenever you have questions feel free to ask and post. This is your safe place. 

5 years is an incredible amount of time to be with someone. The ups and down you mention must have been very confusing for you and im sure it still is to wrap your head around everything. its going to take some time, and a lot of reading on here to fully understand the dynamics of a relationship with someone who has BPD.

You mentioned seeing a therapist, thats honestly a HUGE step forward! Are you doing anything else for yourself besides therapist? As in school, work, gym, friends and family to occupy your time with and have a support system?

As for your breakup, if I may ask to better understand the situation and the relationship, what lead to the break up? How long ago was your breakup? Are you guys still in contact?

Hope to hear from you soon

[Mutt]

Naohio8,

 

I’d like to join CryWolf and welcome you to bpdfamily. I can understand how a breakup with a pwBPD can be you’re left with a lot of questions, feelings and pain.

Please correct me if I’m wrong. Have you been on a break for three years and where you friends in that time but you still have feelings for her? Did the T suggest that she has BPD?