Requested and denied time to heal

[Depression = 72% of members]

No diagnosis but firmly believe I witness and experience traits of BPD from my partner every day.
I have returned from a small stay in hospital for tonsillitis that got out of control and I realised his selfish ways.
I requested one month of him moving out, no contact, but he said no.
So I have asked for a $$$ payout to leave the relationship entirely.
He projects, he distracts, he never confronts the issue and now I’m trapped.
He took $70 and sure he went to the pub.
Zero communication. Zero tolerance.

Lost. Just lost.

[Needahug]

No diagnosis but firmly believe I witness and experience traits of BPD from my partner every day.
I have returned from a small stay in hospital for tonsillitis that got out of control and I realised his selfish ways.
I requested one month of him moving out, no contact, but he said no.
So I have asked for a $$$ payout to leave the relationship entirely.
He projects, he distracts, he never confronts the issue and now I’m trapped.
He took $70 and sure he went to the pub.
Zero communication. Zero tolerance.

Lost. Just lost.

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[pearlsw]

Hi Needahug,

 

Firstly, here:   

Next, sorry to hear about tonsillitis, I've had that! Ouch!

It's so hard not to have someone to rely on when sick! Sorry you are experiencing that! 

Many us have partners who are not diagnosed. That's okay. Just recognizing and dealing with behaviors is enough!

Can you clarify your living situation a bit please? Is he under the same roof? Why do you feel trapped?

with compassion, pearl.

[RolandOfEld]

Hi Needahug, let me join pearlsw in welcoming you here. Talking about your situation with others is a brave first step. You will find a supportive community here.

Your decision to ask him to leave shows that there was a lot of buildup leading up to this. How long have you been together? Would you describe yourself as trapped financially, emotionally, both?

~ROE