Too much to loose

[Depression = 72% of members]

Shortly after we met I started to realize that I was dealing with someone... different. She lied often, mislead/deceived when needed, and it all seemed so natural. Very selfish to the point that she neglected the care of her son (now my step son) and lazy, disorganized and messy. So why did I stay? I am a recovering co-dependent with a history of abuse growing up... and I have always feared loneliness. But I was ready to end it when she informed me that we were pregnant. That changed everything.
It's been now almost 7 years of walking on eggshells. She has had 6 different jobs, threatened me 5 times with a separation, reads my emails, FB posts... but I just can't come to grips with leaving... because of my son.
Even while I type this my anxiety is going thru the roof! If she reads this... oh, my!

[HAFlife]

Shortly after we met I started to realize that I was dealing with someone... different. She lied often, mislead/deceived when needed, and it all seemed so natural. Very selfish to the point that she neglected the care of her son (now my step son) and lazy, disorganized and messy. So why did I stay? I am a recovering co-dependent with a history of abuse growing up... and I have always feared loneliness. But I was ready to end it when she informed me that we were pregnant. That changed everything.
It's been now almost 7 years of walking on eggshells. She has had 6 different jobs, threatened me 5 times with a separation, reads my emails, FB posts... but I just can't come to grips with leaving... because of my son.
Even while I type this my anxiety is going thru the roof! If she reads this... oh, my!

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Harri]

Hi and welcome to the board though i am sorry for what brings you here.  The good news is that we get it here and we can help support you as you work on your end of the relationship.  I am not saying you are doing anything wrong but sometimes we do things that either do not help the situation or make it worse without realizing it.

We have seen a lot of relationships turn around for the better.  Regardless, helping yourself and learning tools and strategies that make things easier for you to cope is going to make a difference.

As for her reading this, as long as you are using a unique ID and are careful to log out and clear cookies, you should be fine.  With over 200,000 members and over 2 million posts with stories that are very similar, it is hard to be found.  Having anxiety about posting is common but keep at it as that too gets better.

If you had one thing you would want to work on in your relationship, something you can do differently, what would it be?