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Author Topic: How to set boundaries? Examples?  (Read 501 times)
hopeandchoices

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 16


« on: December 04, 2019, 12:53:18 PM »

Hello lovely people,

Just looking for some advice on boundaries. I read about setting limits/boundaries in Walking on Eggshells but I can't seem to understand how to put it into practise. It just seems really artificial and awkward and stiff - I want to know when to bring it up, how, and what.

What boundaries do you guys have - do you have any examples so that I can start to compile my own and understand what a boundary looks like?

How did you set a boundary? When did it happen and how? When and how did you reinforce it?

How did it all go?

Would be so grateful to hear your experiences! I need to set some limits but not sure what counts and how to go about it.


Big love xxx
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Ozzie101
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« Reply #1 on: December 05, 2019, 08:27:25 AM »

Hi there, hope!

Setting boundaries is a topic I'm still working on. Have you read this article here? https://bpdfamily.com/content/setting-boundaries

One thing that's been pointed out to me is that when you set a boundary, you don't have to tell the other person -- or anyone. It's set within yourself. For instance, in my case, I didn't say to my H "I will no longer tolerate demands that I cut off my family. That's a boundary for me." I just decided that was something I wouldn't tolerate anymore. If he does demand that, I refuse kindly, but firmly and stand my ground. Hasn't come up in a while so I haven't really practiced that one.

You just need to decide what those boundaries are and think through how you'll respond should that boundary be crossed. We can help with that if you'd like to share.
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