My 19 year old sister has bdp

[mysisterthebdp]

Hi all, this is my first time here. I could use some help/advise.
I have a 19yo sister who is 6 years younger and lives at home. I live away and have come home for a visit. I grew up very close to my sister and left home for further education in her late teens. Even though I made many attempts at staying connected with her, she grew angry and resentful of me. I have been on the receiving end of both her adoration and her rage. She either exalts me of will physically/verbally abuse me.
My sister had a psychotic episode today after along time. I am feeling very anxious and frankly angry. I know its not her fault but its still very frustrating. The smallest of things set her off. I wont lie, Im also very angry about what a state she is putting my parents in. She lives at their house, she refuses to move out- any conversations on that topic sets her off. But she keeps talking about how she wants to be left alone and hates everyone. Its makes me so angry that she chooses to stay here and make everyone around her miserable. My parents cant live their lives because of what she needs and her health issues but it is infuriating that she enjoys free rent, free food and ruins the lives of people around her. The days she is like this, everyone is terrified. I personally get very anxious. I wish there was something I could do to help my parents at least, since she refuses to accept help.

I wish she leaves and exits all our lives. I hope she finds her peace and joy. But I also hope she finds it away from us all. The worst part is that there doesnt seem to be an end date to this misery-for her or my parents. Maybe for me but I feel awful that my parents have to pay such a heavy price for only the simple mistake of having children. My sister seems miserable, and she makes the people around her miserable. Sometimes it makes me angry at God that he is hurting her like this. He should either live happily, in peace or take her back. What cruelty is this that she is kept alive but also kept from living?

This may sound cruel, but you must know that I love her very deeply and try to right by her as much as I can. I have paid for therapy but she refuses to attend. I could use some help on how to cope, help my parents cope and help her cope.

Thank you

[pursuingJoy]

welcome  we're glad you're here.

It's so hard to watch people we love, struggle. Your sister isn't just struggling, she's hurting your parents. BPD hurts everyone involved. 

What happened with the latest psychotic episode? Does she have a job, and do you think your parents put boundaries in practice?

pj