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Author Topic: please translate  (Read 463 times)
rich5a
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Posts: 164


« on: July 29, 2013, 08:55:57 PM »

some everyday staements from my BPDGF... . I have my own interpretations... but am interested in others opinions.

1) You Dont love me!

2) I love you

3) Dont leave me (begging) please.

4)  you dont have anyone else, do you? please no

5) you're not jealous, stop pretending.

6) you dont miss me

The most prominent is " dont leave me" she pleads with me although that is the farthest thing from my mind.

I wonder how long before she leaves me?

Thanks

Rich
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Validation78
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: divorced
Posts: 1398



« Reply #1 on: July 30, 2013, 07:14:34 AM »

Hi Rich!

She's looking for validation. Remember, for pwBPD feelings=facts! You can tell her you love her, miss her, not cheating on her till the cows come home! It's not what she needs. She needs you to validate her feelings, as they are real to her!

For example:

Her:  You don't love me, you don't miss me, please don't leave me!

You: Oh honey, how horrible it must be for you to feel that way. If that's what you think, I can understand why you're upset!

Check out the lessons on the staying board, and read up on validation! I think it may help you to better understand!

Best Wishes,

Val78
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rich5a
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« Reply #2 on: July 30, 2013, 09:13:52 PM »

thanks Val
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an0ught
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic Partner
Relationship status: married
Posts: 5048



« Reply #3 on: August 03, 2013, 07:44:10 AM »

Hi Rich,

1) You Dont love me!

2) I love you

3) Dont leave me (begging) please.

4)  you dont have anyone else, do you? please no

5) you're not jealous, stop pretending.

6) you dont miss me

fear of abandonment on her side... .

I wonder how long before she leaves me?

... . fear of abandonment on your side?

I believe you breadhead... . I do . Why is it so difficult to take care of myself. I can care for everyone but myself.

It is sometimes worth exploring simple but deep questions you ask yourself.
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  Writing is self validation. Writing on bpdfamily is self validation squared!
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