When BPDH deciedes to go non contact with kids how much blame do you get?

[awomanlearning]

Last friday things came to a head with father and daughter age 8. He tried to tell her mom is keeping him from seeing her she knows the truth i would like him in their lives a lot more (my own daddy issues adored mine) and called him a liar there were other things but at the end of the skype conversation, which he was recording, he found out shes not in therapy but tells me everything she feels. Long and short of it daughter doesnt want to talk to dad because he hurt mommies feelings, he was laughing and shouting got you to me via skype daughter was witness to this behaviour.

Now its been a week since his contacted the children via skype he cant phone because i changed my number his was threatening via text i had enough of the mind games and changed my number straight away. There is no reason i can see that he hasnt contacted his children there is skype and email at his disposal and yet nothing. 

The scarest thing is my daughter has said to me shes isnt missing her dad twice now on different days when i asked her if her dad skyped. That sends shivers down my spine that she feels like this, again my daddy issues i want there to be a relationship. I have asked her to leave a message on skype for him she has done anything yet.

So when you ex stops talking to the kids how much blame is placed at your door for their decision?

[DreamGirl]

I'm a little confused.

Do you sit on conversations with daughter? And then he yells at you? Any way to be in the other room when they Skype?

Any chance to help daughter set her own boundary with Dad?

"Let's not talk about mom, let's talk about _____"

[awomanlearning]

I dont sit in the room, i allow them to skype freely with their dad but i over heard him telling our daughter stuff she shouldnt be told about but i have spoken to my daughter about saying how she feels which she did. But i should never have let it get that far! No 8 year old should be put in such a position they should be having a childhood not standing up to a controlling father who wants to fracture their lives with information about our issues. I know she is strong enough to handle him but that should never be her place there should just be visitation, time with her father and good memories those are tainted now with instances of him trying to make her take sides no child should have that placed on their shoulders. Sorry about the rant i just want them to have a normal father and daughter relationship again my own daddy issues. I want him to visit more be a good father give them great memories even though his not part of this family i want lots of contact between the kids and him but that isnt up to me that is up to him i know i have no control, really wish i had  :'(