Good on you!
Psychology Today - Find a TherapistAlways phone and chat to them about what their speciality is first - someone well versed in BPD is always helpful. We don't really need a therapist with DBT experience. DBT is great for us too however if you are looking for a DBT therapist for your wife, your wife needs to seek that out not you.
Also BPD_support we don't always click with the first therapist we see. My first one reminded me of my great aunt! Second one I found is a gem and have been seeing her for 2 years - invaluable.
Often our own issues come out in therapy - which is a wonderful thing. My choice in partner was certainly reminiscent of my childhood. I have a BPD parent.
Hope this helps