Conclusion

[Artimer]

Last night I finally came to the conclusion that we all have to walk the path of recovery in our own separate way. The advice on here is absolutely invaluable, yet, until we go through the process of recovery, we never really take the advice onboard. At least that is the case in my journey.

Despite all the good advice I thought I knew better, but today I realise that BPD/NPD is something so big and nasty.

After a week of NC, I was re-engaged by the exBPDgf. With words as sweet as honey, I got sucked back into being a caregiver. Ranging from being there whenever she had hit rock bottom with depression, right down to spending a load of money to fix her car & buying her kids their birthday gifts, right down to buying her glasses after her visit to an optometrist. I was played with, like a cat played with a mouse before it kills it. I was sent provocative pictures of her, her hinting about sex with me, you name it. She even got jealous when she thought I was out on a date.

When I finally put her on the spot, I got tod that she's only interested in being friends. Then when I didn't reply to her message fast enough, I got called childish. Yet she could wait 6 hours before replying to mine.

On the positive side though, I did expect this to happen, so I'm not exactly hurting. I've now also severed all contact to her.

[enlighten me]

Yes Artimer we do think we know better and our case is different. Unfortunately like you say its not until we come out of the other side that we realise we had already been given the answers and advice needed but just failed to take heed of it.

I just started watching 2 1/2 men. I think its the first or second episode when the brother is running around after his ex wife doing all the chores and fixing things for her and I thought to myself that was me. Charlie sheens character was telling him he was being used and the brother wouldn't listen. It was only when he realised that he was being used and stood up to her that she then recycled him and drew him back in.

It was quite sad for me to watch as it reminded me of all the people that had told me to let go and stop being so nice and I knew better and ended up getting even more hurt.

[Mutt]

Last night I finally came to the conclusion that we all have to walk the path of recovery in our own separate way. The advice on here is absolutely invaluable, yet, until we go through the process of recovery, we never really take the advice onboard. At least that is the case in my journey.

That's good advice Artimer. Take what advice works for you and apply it for your healing. I can say that I didn't always listen to people's advice as good and wise as it was. I had to experience the lessons for myself. Don't be hard on yourself.

[Artimer]

Yes Artimer we do think we know better and our case is different. Unfortunately like you say its not until we come out of the other side that we realise we had already been given the answers and advice needed but just failed to take heed of it.

I just started watching 2 1/2 men. I think its the first or second episode when the brother is running around after his ex wife doing all the chores and fixing things for her and I thought to myself that was me. Charlie sheens character was telling him he was being used and the brother wouldn't listen. It was only when he realised that he was being used and stood up to her that she then recycled him and drew him back in.

It was quite sad for me to watch as it reminded me of all the people that had told me to let go and stop being so nice and I knew better and ended up getting even more hurt.

I remember that episode .

[Artimer]

Last night I finally came to the conclusion that we all have to walk the path of recovery in our own separate way. The advice on here is absolutely invaluable, yet, until we go through the process of recovery, we never really take the advice onboard. At least that is the case in my journey.

That's good advice Artimer. Take what advice works for you and apply it for your healing. I can say that I didn't always listen to people's advice as good and wise as it was. I had to experience the lessons for myself. Don't be hard on yourself.

Thanks Mutt. Strangely I'm okay, even though tonight is party night with the friends and tomorrow will be hangover day 

[Mutt]

Have fun with friends