When to move on from 3 year BPD relationship

[HockeyDad]

New member

Struggling with destructive behaviors from my BPD partner: substance abuse and emotional instability

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Daniell85]

Hi, I am sorry you are finding yourself in this place 

What is it you would like to see happen with your relationship?

To the right of this page are a lot of links and Lessons about BPD. Have you had a chance to read them? It's a lot of information! If you have specific questions, we are here to help.

[vortex of confusion]

 

Welcome to the forums!

Your thread title indicates that you are thinking about moving on. When to move on is a difficult decision to make. In addition to the lessons on this forum, the Undecided forum has some good lessons too. The lessons there are aimed at helping one to decide when to move on.

Are there still good things about your relationship?

A lot of times substance abuse issues exacerbate emotional instability. What does her emotional instability look like? For some people, it is extreme rage and dangerous behaviors. Has your partner exhibited any dangerous behavior? Or, is it the more mild kind where it is moody, passive aggressive, and unpredictable but not necessarily dangerous? I ask because the first thing to look at in these kinds of relationships is whether or not you are physically safe.

Keep posting and people will try to help you navigate things. It isn't easy.