What a long strange trip its been

[Kesata]

When I was younger, I loved that phrase. I thought it funny. Now it is the best description I know of my life with a BPD daughter. I am married to a man who has stood with me through all of it, and we continue to support each other. Our adopted daughter, my husband and I were in a terrible shooting attack when she was 6. DH almost died, daughter was shot, I had minor head and arm wounds. Since that day, our lives have not really been our own. We have gone through the motions, but never felt since that we had either free will or control. Our daughter's behavioral issues,  residential placement at 13 after beginning an eating disorder and threatening suicide. After that, more therapy. Then a dx of BPD. Some therapists promised DBT, but never delivered the full deal, or when her behaviors became too intense, dropped her as a client with zero transition.  School issues-public HS are not equipped to handle mentally ill students. And then a boy she knew walked in to his classroom with a gun, and shot himself. While on lock-down, through the window of the room she was in, she saw the SWAT team guns raised coming toward the building. Five days in the psych ward and mental health sts facility. Tried community college 20 min away, she hated it. Kept checking her self into the ER, claiming she had been raped (not true but 3 times she claimed it). Began driving her 8hrs round trip for her to attend the real deal DBT treatment once a week. She moved back home, assaulted me, then police & court. We got her an attorney and an apartment. Atty tried to get her into a mental health diversion program. Rejected because she was BPD-a tier 2 disorder, and told BPDs only fail and end up jail. She got a great job, quit in 3 weeks. Now the eating disorder is full blown, her DBT therapist has closed her chart because she was not doing anything to help herself. Sent her and her psychiatrist a list of ED inpatient treatment facilities. Last night police called because she overdosed-then threw up, Zolof.

What a long strange trip it truly has been.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[lbjnltx]

Hi Kesata,

I'm glad you are here and sorry to hear about all the trauma you and your family have experienced. 

How is she doing after last night?  Is she in the hospital now?


lbj

[madmom]

Hello Kesata, I am sure you are exhausted and overwhelmed from this ordeal.  I just want you to know that I am thinking about you.  I can tell from your post how very much you love your child and will go to great lengths to help her get better.  I just want you to know that we are here for you, when you have time please give us an update and let us know how we can help and support you.