Thanks, glad the poem is of help... .His Mother just called me. It upset me that she said he had gone up there for a funeral and was on his best behavior. That the last 10 years have been hell and that they dealt with it even more as a kid. I am not sure she meant anything bad by it, but it just doesn't make me feel good when she said he had nothing but good things to say about me and that he treated me awful, I didn't deserve it and he would always regret it. I do not believe him or he would't have done all he did. I feel like this was for show for them. She says she is just holding onto the good memories, because she wants to be happy. She wants me to move on and be happy. She just doesn't understand how hard this is... .I was crying when she called. Really embarrassing... .They are stuck with him for life and I am not. She told me she is worried he could be a danger to me, so She wants me to be done with him for my safety. I just don't understand why people think you should just be out dating and forgetting about all the torture you just went through? I am doing the best that I can. I am sad I had such a screwed up marriage! I hate that he is not acting out right now, because I feel like he is trying to make it out like it's all my fault!
That was a beautiful poem Herodias. Thank you for sharing. As you say, he is probably just being on 'best behaviour' as a show for other people. People have different ways of dealing with things. Perhaps his Mum is trying to see him in the best possible light as a way to deny all the suffering. It is nice that she is looking out for your safety. I can understand it is frustrating when people just expect you to move on like it was nothing. She probably had a very different relationship to him as you did with him. And don't ever think it is your fault!
Today is going to be hard. Do what you feel is helpful for you right now and heal at your own pace. Today is bound to be a very difficult day, hopefully it will get a bit easier day by day.
Alot of people don't understand these types of relationships. But you have the support of members on this board that know very much what you are going through. You experienced an abusive relationship. You are a survivor! You are strong!
