So I've been making headway in detaching, less internal reaction to thoughts of the past, etc. Recognizing my part in the r/s which was a role of self-sacrifice to the expense of my self.
I keep having dreams with common themes. One of them is zombies. According to dream interpretation websites these symbolize people you have no more attachment to. The problem is these zombies look like other people, vaguely like other women I've been with however shortly. The latest dream had me in an elevator with a few other people around my age, playing different roles. We were in a huge tower with many floors, some of them classrooms, others apartments, others shops I presume. I was in there with a woman and two men, one of whom was a security guard. He killed and bagged one of the zombies and I was afraid of getting too close to it and getting infected.
At another point I'm in a neighborhood talking to my ex on a phone or a video phone and she's trying to tell me she's better off, very immature dialogue and I start to see how childish it all is. At the end of the dream I remember thinking, "I'm so much better than him. You're an idiot. You're ridiculous. Wow she was playing up even her intelligence to control me." Her new boyfriend was in a house next door (we live pretty close irl, across the highway he is) and some cops were around his house, I think he was telling them something about me? Or something to do with part of his Christmas lights being out... .which also connected to my house. But they never bothered me. We'll see what I hear about this Christmas I suppose. I think the cops symbolize the guy's whacked out moral compass where he hooked up with my ex despite me telling him no and getting her pregnant; and she's due in November.
Anyway, I await the dream where SHE is a zombie that
I've shot in the head
I find it convenient that we can process these heavy emotions in our dreams.
